Being Different Isn't a Crime
by Jasmine4
Summary: About the kindling romance of Sirius and Remus as they move through hogwarts dealing with teenage hormones, humour, angst, love and babies. First five chapters amended slightly and reformatted. Enjoy
1. Default Chapter

Being Different isn't a Crime  
  
Author: Jasmine  
  
Rating:PG-13  
  
Warning: Eventual slash RL/SB  
  
Summary: Your typical Marauders at Hogwarts I suppose. About the developing relationships between Remus and Sirius and Lily and James leading up to the arrival of our friend Harry. Fun, romance and a bit of angst (well knowing me probably a fair bit). I've written now for about 6 years but never a HP fic before. I've read lots of Harry potter fiction but never thought I'd be up to writing all the magical stuff but thought I'd have a go at it. I particularly like the marauders stories so I thought the best way was to write one myself as I think it was.  
  
Reviews: would be greatly appreciated even if it was just to let me know you're enjoying it and constructive criticism is always welcomed. Flames will be used to light my cigarettes (yes I know it's not a good habit!)  
  
Disclaimer: Very sadly none of them are mine, if they were I wouldn't be living on the bones of my arse off my overdraft!  
  
A/N: This has been all reformatted and betaed and a few amendments have been made to fit in with areas of canon associated with OOTP. Enjoy  
  
Remus Lupin slid into a cabin on the Hogwarts express. He chewed nervously on his bottom lip. What would this new venture hold for somebody like him? He'd never been to school before, well not that he could remember. Yes, a play-group when he was about 3 but then it had happened, bitten and normality was ended. His mother's words rang in his ears 'Sweetheart, if you don't want to go you can just stay at home you know. Nobody will think any less of you if you'd rather just keep learning at home.' But Remus didn't want that. He wanted a life, a normal life for an eleven year old. He wanted to try and forget that he was different. That he was a werewolf. He wanted friends, but how? He'd never had friends before. Just his parents. They loved him dearly and understood his condition but he couldn't be happy at home, living thoroughly sheltered.  
  
His thoughts were broken as two boisterous boys burst into his carriage and one of them promptly tripped over the other and landed in Remus' lap. "Whoops!" He exclaimed making no attempt to remove himself from Remus' lap.  
  
"Get up you prat!" A relatively small and slender boy with glasses said yanking his friend up. "Sorry about that. I'm James Potter, this is Sirius Black." He nodded towards the longer haired boy who had now picked himself up.  
  
"It's ok." Remus said quietly and rubbed his knee where the boy named Sirius had landed.  
  
"Well then, don't you have a name?" Sirius asked bouncing into the seat beside Remus.  
  
"Oh.erm..yes I do." Remus blushed and looked down. James placed himself opposite the pair and looked with kind brown eyes into the lowered green- gold eyes.  
  
"Well what is it then stupid?" Sirius said patting Remus on the back and laughing.  
  
"Oh, Remus, Remus Lupin."  
  
"Nice to meet you Remus. Don't be nervous. We're first years too." James smiled gently.  
  
Before long Remus' nervousness had subsided and the boys were chatting away like they'd known each other for years. "My Dad says that there is this forest at Hogwarts." The blond boy named Peter who had joined them shortly afterwards said.  
  
"Yeah!" Sirius said bouncing around his seat. "It's forbidden! The Forbidden Forest. Can't you just see it? We can go investigating it.  
  
"Remus laughed lightly. "I've known you for about an hour and you are the most mad person I think I've ever met!" In his head Remus thought 'Not that I've met that many people!' "But you know what, I really like you. All of you! I really hope we all end up in the same house. I think we could be really good friends!"  
  
James grinned back. "We already are." Remus glowed inwardly. Nobody had ever said that to him before.  
  
"Back to the good stuff lads!" Sirius announced. "Lets plan our first trip into the forest!" They all nodded. James eagerly, Remus less so and Peter very nervously beginning to think bringing this up hadn't been such a bright idea.  
  
"It's meant to be full of wild animals though." Peter said softly, hoping that Sirius really wasn't planning on dragging them on some crazy expedition.  
  
"Yeah, there's meant to be.." The long- haired boy paused for effect. "Werewolves!" Remus paled considerably. They would hate him; how could they possibly not.  
  
"Are you ok Rem?" James asked reaching across to him.  
  
"Oh yes. Fine. I've been a bit poorly the last couple of days that's all. I'm alright now, just a little weak still I suppose." He shrugged and hoped to change the subject. The full moon had been two days ago and it was true he had been a little off colour since then but he had forgotten all about that because he was so happy but the words Sirius spoke next made the bottom fall out of his stomach.  
  
"We could be like hunters couldn't we? Imagine it Jamie." Sirius spoke to the boy he'd been friends with since they were born. "Hunting werewolves!" He laughed.  
  
Remus stood up hurriedly. "Excuse me a minute." He shot out of the carriage ignoring the other's asking what he was doing. He just made it to the join between the carriages, out in the open air when the sickness got the better of him and he heaved over the edge, vomiting the chocolate frogs Peter had been sharing back up. Tears stung his eyes. Had he given himself away? Would they think he was strange running off like this? Had he just ruined everything?  
  
Suddenly he felt a hand on his back rubbing it and the other hand pulling back his golden hair. "I'm sorry." Remus sobbed wiping his mouth with a hanky he produced from his pocket.  
  
"Hey, don't worry." Remus felt his body sink into Sirius' embrace. "Don't cry silly. You can't help throwing up! Now then, how about some more chocolate frogs, I think you just lost the last ones!" Sirius smiled and Remus melted. This boy was a joy send.  
  
***  
  
"Remus Lupin." The prim and proper voice of Professor McGonagall rang out around the great hall.  
  
"That's you!" James said pushing Remus, whose feet were stuck to the spot, forward. "Good luck!"  
  
He sat nervously on the stool and placed the hat on his head, smiling as Sirius gave him the thumbs up. 'Please let me be with Sirius, please.' Remus thought desperately, not wanting to be divided from any of his three new friends but least of all from Sirius. He had been so kind and warm to him.  
  
"Ah, a werewolf indeed!" Remus thought for a horrible moment he was going to be sick again. The voice was so loud in his ear, had everyone else heard too. "Don't worry, they can't hear." The hat spoke reassuringly. "You're a brave soul Mr Lupin, and a kind heart as well. Intelligent too I don't wonder. You'll go far young man. I see, you want to be with your friend. Interesting. You'd do well in Ravenclaw, but no, maybe.GRYFFINDOR!" Remus sighed with relief and scuttled over to the table where Sirius nearly winded him hugging him so hard.  
  
"This is great isn't it?" James said as he removed his glasses and got into his four poster bed. "Just the four of us in this room, just how we wanted it."  
  
Yawning Peter agreed. "Couldn't be better. I'm dreading the classes though from tomorrow. I bet you three are all total brain boxes and I'll be the dunce in the corner!"  
  
Remus laughed. Sirius noticed how when Remus laughed it was almost a tinkle, as if it wasn't something he did often. "Don't be daft Pete. We're all better at some things than others. There's a lot more to life than grades. Everyone has different qualities. It's what makes us different, special." Although I'm special and different and just want to be normal he thought, but dismissed it quickly realising he'd never been so happy in his life.  
  
"Wise words old man." Sirius joked.  
  
"Oh shut up you uncouth whippersnapper!" Remus retorted and everybody fell about laughing not previously having realised how witty Remus could be beneath the quiet and placid exterior.  
  
***  
  
Peter hadn't been too far wrong when he had said the other three would be clever. It soon emerged that Remus had a real talent for defence against the dark arts while James excelled at charms. Sirius was a star at causing mayhem but still seemed to be brilliant at everything else. How he accomplished this nobody was quite sure! Peter wasn't as bad as he had anticipated; he managed to get by with a little help now and then. All in all school was great. Well, apart from potions with the awful Slytherins.  
  
It became noticeable from early on that the two houses were archenemies and it was perfectly understandable for the Gryffindor first year boys to dislike their Slytherin counterparts. After all they permanently got them into trouble, jibed them and tried to play tricks on them to make the Gryffindors loose house points.  
  
"Well if it isn't fatty and skinny!" A scathing voice came from behind Peter and Remus as they left the dungeon to head towards lunch. Sirius and James, who had been working together, had been made to stay behind to talk to Professor Brewer after their potion had exploded. James had a feeling it might have had something to do with Malfoy and Snape but he couldn't prove it so no doubt himself and Sirius were in for detention or line writing!  
  
"Ignore them." Peter hissed increasing his pace, scared of the Slytherins without Sirius around.  
  
"Don't worry Pettigrew there will still be food left on the table even if you just saunter there, no need to run! Not that you need anymore food though. Lupin mind, he could do with a feed. Does fatty here not let you eat anything, if you get any more thin you'll disappear!"  
  
"And that would be a terrible tragedy wouldn't it Lucius." The evil voice of Severus Snape piped up.  
  
"Bugger off Snape!" Sirius voice could now be heard much to both Remus and Peter's relief.  
  
"We were just saying how odd fatty and skinny here look and here comes beanpole and shortarse to join them, what a treat Severus!"  
  
"It's better than being a greasy bastard like you!" James said with a smirk.  
  
"Perhaps you could take tips off Malfoy here, he obviously loves being perfectly groomed! Spends at least two hours doing his hair a day. You spend about the same time a year Snape!" The Slytherin boy glared and stalked past with Malfoy.  
  
Remus, in a moment of rashness took his wand "Hydratio!" and fired water from it. "There's a start Snape! Now all you need is some shampoo!"  
  
Everyone laughed and Sirius slung his arm around Remus' shoulder. "You'll have to show me how to do that!"  
  
Remus nodded and smiled. "Anytime Siri, anytime.  
  
***  
  
"So then, boys," James began grinning mischievously, "I was thinking what with it being the weekend and all maybe we could go exploring tonight, get the invisibility cloak out for the night, maybe steal some food from the kitchens." Peter was eagerly nodding his head as was Sirius.  
  
"Remy?" Sirius said looking quizzically on the downcast face.  
  
"Erm, I'd really love to but erm my Grandma, she's not too well so I have to erm go and see her." He hated lying, particularly to his friends, but his friends would be no more should they find out.  
  
Everyone nodded and then later when he did disappear off and Peter was in the shower Sirius pulled James to the side in the common room. "He's lying." He stated plaintively.  
  
"Who is?" James asked confused.  
  
"Remus. I have no idea what he is doing, but I don't think it is his grandmother do you?"  
  
James shrugged. "Dunno really, never thought about it. I mean why would he lie?"  
  
"I'm not sure." The longer haired boy spoke slowly thinking carefully. "When he gets back tomorrow we'll ask him."  
  
James nodded and jumped with a start when Peter arrived. "Ready then? I'm starving!"  
  
***  
  
Remus appeared in the dormitory late the following afternoon. He looked gaunt and pale. Peter was in the library doing his homework, James was out watching the quidditch team practising and Sirius was dosing on his bed. Remus quietly slipped into his own bed, just wanting to sleep, still feeling poorly from the after effects of the painful transformation. Fortunately the places he had wounded himself were virtually healed due to the expertise of Madame Pomfrey and anyhow they were all beneath his clothes at least.  
  
"Hey you." Sirius said upon sitting up and yawning like a cat.  
  
"Hey yourself." Remus gave a weak smile and rested his aching head on the pillow.  
  
"So then how's your grandmother?"  
  
"My what? Oh..my grandma.not too bad thanks. Could be better."  
  
Sirius raised an eyebrow. "By the looks of it so could you." Remus froze momentarily but Sirius still noticed. "Rem? Where were you really last night. I can tell you're not being honest with me."  
  
"Are you saying I'm a liar?" Remus asked panic rising in his voice.  
  
"No silly, but I know you're evading the truth somewhere. I'm not going to think any less of you stupid, I'm your best mate, tell me what's wrong. I mean it's the third time since we started here that you have disappeared."  
  
Remus sucked in his breath waiting for Sirius to tell him he knew but he didn't. "Come on Remus, it's obviously bothering you. Problem shared is a problem halved."  
  
Remus looked up with big, were they frightened Sirius wondered, golden eyes. "I don't want to talk about it Siri, it's difficult."  
  
Sirius nodded thoughtfully. "Is it problems at home? Is there anything I can do? I don't really like my parents that much but I'd like to get on with them I suppose. If you ever want to talk about difficulties at home, or anything I'd like to listen"  
  
"Something like that." Remus nodded breathing a sigh of relief when Sirius seemed to buy this. "And yes, can I have a hug." The fair headed boy blinked back tears as he felt Sirius embrace him. "I'm sorry Sirius, I'd tell you but I can't!"  
  
Sirius soothingly rubbed his back. Nobody gave hugs like Sirius Remus thought to himself as he rested his tired head on his friend's shoulder. "Well when you do want to talk I'm always here for you right? You know that." Remus nodded gratefully and wiped the corners of his eyes with his hand. "Right well I'm going in the shower because otherwise my head will resemble Snape's!" Remus laughed and Sirius smiled. "That's better!" He kissed his smaller friend's forehead and left the room, towel flung carelessly across his shoulder.  
  
"Oh Sirius." Remus sighed once again burying his face in the pillow. "If only you knew then you wouldn't get that close to me. And as for being there to hear it, you really wouldn't want to, you wouldn't want to know me." Remus jumped as James bounded into the room.  
  
"Talking to yourself Rem? First sign of madness is that you crazy beast!" He giggled.  
  
"Hello James." Remus spoke lethargically. "And yes I'm mad, totally mad." He said with a voice full of sorrow and turned over in his bed and drifted into a miserable fitful sleep.  
  
***  
  
Christmas came and went with all four of the boys staying behind. Much to their disappointment Severus Snape and Lucius Malfoy went home so all the plots to carry out pranks on their two enemies went to pieces but they still had a good time helping each other with homework, playing in the snow, sharing their presents. But it was New Years Eve that got everybody thinking. Dumbledore had announced a feast and a small party for the few who were still at the school over the holiday party. Remus face couldn't have got any longer even if Snape had cast a spell on it!  
  
"I really want to go but my parents are having a family party and well I'm their only child and the family would be upset if I didn't go. I kind of have to!"  
  
"Can't you try to get out of it?" James said pleadingly, really wanting his friend to stay so the four of them could be together for the party.  
  
"Yeah it's not the same without you!" Sirius said.  
  
"Yeah it is." Remus said. "You'll still have a great time. It's hardly like I'm some major party animal is it." He tried to sound jovial even though he really just wanted to curl up and cry. Why did he have to be a werewolf? Why couldn't the moon just disappear, even if it was just for tonight. Life wasn't fair.  
  
"No it isn't the same without you. We'll all miss you." Sirius' words made Remus even more miserable. These people really cared about him, that was obvious, yet he was living a lie to them, because if they found out the truth they would hate him and he'd sooner lie than loose his friends, the most important thing in his life!  
  
But Remus had to go and so it just left three boys getting dressed for the party in the dormitory. James glanced out of the window. "Look at the moon, doesn't it look beautiful."  
  
Peter laughed. "You're starting to sound like Remus!"  
  
Sirius laughed too. "Nothing wrong with being like Remy, he's lovely. Nicer than I'll ever be anyhow."  
  
"Remus.." James said under his breath, eyes still on the moon. "I wonder." But he said no more.  
  
The party was a success, James and Sirius clowning around, acting like a couple dancing about much to Peter's horror. "That's awful, you look like a pair of puffs!"  
  
"That my dearest Pete was the idea!" James laughed having had a few drinks, which Sirius had stolen from the teachers' alcohol supply. All three of them were in their beds the following morning when Remus sunk into his own. When they woke James excused himself and disappeared to the library. He had to find more out. He had to know.  
  
***  
  
Lessons began again and school life became normal. James seemed to be spending quite a lot of time in the library and was being quite secretive about it. Sirius joked that he was trying to work out how to do a love potion so Snape would fall for him much to James' horror.  
  
"Maybe it's more likely he wants to clean Snape by magic so we aren't all going to die from the lack of hygiene!" Peter suggested while Remus softly added.  
  
"I think perhaps a love potion is correct, for Lily Evans."  
  
James shook his head truthfully but blushed because Remus had hit a nerve. The redheaded girl was rather pretty, but at the same time James didn't want a girlfriend, he was too young for all the loved up stuff he thought. Flying had become a favourite with both James and Sirius. James, determined to eventually make it onto the quidditch team, concentrated really hard during lessons while Sirius just enjoyed them as he got to terrify everyone else, particularly Remus who was nervous about leaving the ground, by daredevil stunts. Peter was pleased Remus wasn't confident in the air, at least he was better at something than Remus, even if it was only marginally so! It made him feel less inadequate!  
  
Before they knew it April had come and Remus had his nose buried even further into his books, desperate to prove himself, not going to let Albus Dumbledore, who had given him this fabulous opportunity, down. Exams would be coming up soon. Peter was already losing sleep over it, convinced he would fail everything. James hadn't started doing too much work yet but had the odd look over things he had found complex but Sirius spent most of his time laughing at them. "Where's your sense of adventure boys, read the notes the night before, it'll be fine!"  
  
Remus looked up, a little hurt by Sirius' words "It's alright for you, I need to work to do well. I have to do well, I need to prove I'm good at things!" He bit his lip hard, he wasn't going to come over all emotional and ridiculous! He pressed his book further towards his face but got a fright when his friend landed with a bump on the bed.  
  
"Oi, no need to get stroppy. It's Easter tomorrow! Think of all the chocolate!"  
  
Remus nodded but there was still a scowl on his face. "Just let me do what I want and I'll let you do whatever the hell you want!" Sirius left him alone, not having seen Remus cross before.  
  
That night Remus, who had been quiet for the rest of the day and hadn't spoken another word to Sirius, went to Madame Pomfrey's room to be taken to the Whomping Willow to transform. He hated the loneliness of it, walking through the dirty passage into the desolate house where all he would feel was pain and hatred for himself. He hadn't meant to loose his temper with Sirius, he cared about Sirius more than he could possibly describe, but it was so difficult on the day of the full moon to control himself.  
  
Usually he managed but today he just snapped and he knew if he'd opened his mouth one more time only abuse would have come out and so he hadn't managed to apologise to his boisterous friend. He removed his clothing and sunk onto the wooden bed feeling miserable and angry with himself. He never let his temper get the better of him, what if he'd ruined the best friendship he'd had and Sirius wouldn't accept his apology. He knew that every time he disappeared they got more and more suspicious and it was all because he was different. Maybe he should never have come to school. Perhaps it would have been better if the wolf that marked him had just killed him and he hadn't been rescued!  
  
That night in the dormitory Sirius was pacing the floor. "Well didn't I make a great job of things today!" He growled as he stomped from one end of the room to the other. "I've upset Remus. I didn't realise he was this sensitive because I'm so busy playing the fucking fool! I didn't mean to hurt him so much he wouldn't even come back to the room or even to dinner! Maybe I better try to find him. I feel really shit!"  
  
James let Sirius have his rant while Peter was stuffing his face with an Easter egg sent by his mother that he couldn't wait any longer to eat even though it wasn't technically Easter until the following day! "Siri, Peter. Look outside." They both glanced out the window. "Yeah what about it?" Sirius snapped. "There's nothing out there!"  
  
"Look again." James said calmly not letting Sirius' bad mood get to him.  
  
"Stop being so ridiculous James and tell me what the hell you're talking about because I'm not in the mood for mind games!"  
  
James sighed and took a deep breath. "It's a full moon."  
  
Peter nodded. "It was a full moon last time Remy wasn't here, maybe he likes watching the sky or something, he might go to the astronomy tower?"  
  
James shook his head. "No, I think he might be a...a werewolf." Peter gasped in horror and Sirius shook his head slowly, a lot dawning on him, knowing James was right yet hardly wanting to believe it.  
  
"He always goes when it's full moon and he's really secretive about it. I've suspected for a while and that's what I've been doing in the library so much." James admitted.  
  
"I just thought you'd turning into a swot!" Sirius joked trying to lift the atmosphere.  
  
"But he can't be a werewolf." Peter tried to argue not wanting to believe it. "He'd have told us! Anyhow werewolves are evil creatures and Remus, well he's nice isn't he?!"  
  
"Oh hello I'm Remus and I'm a werewolf. Of course he wouldn't tell us you fool!" Sirius yelled. "He thinks we'll hate him because like you've just said everyone thinks werewolves are evil. It all makes sense now. All the secrecy and sneaking off like this. He's trying to hide it. Poor Remus!"  
  
Peter looked like his eyes were about to pop out of his head! "Poor...Poor Remus? We've been sleeping in the room with a dark creature! And you feel sorry for Remus? He could have murdered us in our sleep!"  
  
James shook his head. "Peter, he's our friend, he needs our support, it's not as if it's something he wanted to be. Anyhow, yes werewolves are dangerous but their human forms aren't. I've spent hours researching this because I've suspected for a while but didn't say anything in case I was wrong but I don't think I am. Remus is our friend and he needs us. He's probably never had friends before us and we mean a lot to him. That's why he's sensitive."  
  
Sirius nodded fervently. "He's our friend and I for one don't care if he's a werewolf, he's a lovely person, like I've said before a better one than I'll ever be, hell he even cares about the Slytherins and won't let us do anything that would actually hurt them, just embarrass them! He's gentle and caring, not nasty and dangerous, at least not as a human. That's what he is Pete, a human being and until now he's been a good friend to you and helped you with your work much more than either me or Jamie and he hasn't tried to eat you has he?!"  
  
Peter nodded feeling more than a little embarrassed.  
  
"We'll talk to him in the morning, let him know we know and are alright with it." James said to all round agreement.  
  
***  
  
"Hi Remus." James said as he came back into the dormitory near to lunchtime on Easter Sunday.  
  
"How are you feeling?" Peter asked twitchily, still not thoroughly delighted at the idea of sharing a bedroom with a dark creature but knowing it was wrong to take it out on Remus.  
  
"Fine why shouldn't I be?" He asked, feeling the familiar knot tying in his already unsteady tummy.  
  
"Rem, I'm sorry about yesterday." Sirius said guiltily, "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."  
  
"Oh Siri, don't worry about it, I wasn't exactly nice to you either, it's forgotten."  
  
"Erm." James began looking around the other three for a bit of moral support. "We know about your erm being a werewolf."  
  
The small amount of colour that Remus did have drained from his face and he stumbled backwards onto Peter's bed.  
  
"So you've found out." He muttered, trembling with fear of rejection, knowing they couldn't fail to dislike him and not want to know him anymore. "I'm sorry." He said biting so hard on his lower lip that he could taste blood. "I would have told you but I couldn't, I knew you'd hate me. You must hate me." He closed his eyes fighting with his tears knowing they were going to get the better of him no matter how hard he tried to stop them.  
  
"Of course we don't hate you." He felt Sirius sit down beside him and he looked nervously up at his dark headed friend but could hardly see him for the tears clouding his vision.  
  
"You're our best friend." James added as Sirius put an arm around the weeping boy. "It doesn't matter to us. You've been a werewolf all along and it doesn't change our feelings towards you, you're our friend."  
  
"Exactly." Peter piped up, not wanting to look like he was disowning Remus either.  
  
"How can you not hate me though?" Remus sobbed. "I'm a werewolf for Merlin's sake. I'm a dark creature, nobody wants to know dark creatures."  
  
Sirius gathered Remus totally into his arms and held him tightly. "You are our friend, how could we possibly hate you when you haven't done anything wrong? You're kind and gentle, clever and witty and you make us all happy to be around. You aren't a bad person you were just unlucky Rem. We could never hate you. Nobody must suffer from this more than you!"  
  
Remus nodded. "Thank you. I thought nobody would want me anymore. I thought if you ever found out I'd have to leave!"  
  
"You'd better not!" Peter said. "I'd definitely fail my exams without you to help me!"  
  
Everyone laughed and Remus scrubbed at his damp eyes with the heels of his hands. "You must think I'm such a baby, I always cry."  
  
"Remus I think you're the bravest of the lot of us!" James said with genuine admiration. "If you ever want to talk about it just come to us and we're here to listen ok?"  
  
The young werewolf smiled weakly and nodded. "I don't deserve you, I really don't. All of you are wonderful. I don't really like talking about it but it means a lot that you can accept what I am.who I am. If I want to talk though I will let you know and I'm glad you're willing to listen, it means a lot. Oh and, please, don't tell anyone else about this, nobody else would be this understanding."  
  
Before he knew what was happening James and Peter had dived on them joining in for a group hug. "You know Remus? Being different isn't a crime!" And for the first time in many years Remus realised that perhaps it wasn't.  
  
***  
  
The rest of the school year was relatively non-eventful, with exams coming up nobody was willing to play too many tricks. Remus became more accepting of himself. If his friends could accept him he should be able to accept himself he thought and it particularly helped that his friends were so kind to him before and after the transformation giving him all the support he needed and helping him tend to any self inflicted wounds that remained on the boy from the vicious teeth of the wolf.  
  
The exams weren't as bad as everyone had expected. James and Remus were in the top of their year group with Sirius not far behind. He realised perhaps a slight amount more of work might have paid off slightly better so decided next year if he did a bit more he would get better results. "After all Jamie I can't let you shame me by beating me can I?" He'd joked, his competitive streak showing through. Peter had scraped a pass, although he put the pass mark in potions down to Remus' skill and his luck!  
  
So they were all ready to leave school for the summer. Remus was disappointed even though he was looking forward to seeing his parents and telling them all about the wonderful time he was having at Hogwarts. "I'm going to ask Mum if you can all stay for the summer for a while!" Remus announced as the train pulled back into Kings Cross station.  
  
"Mum!" He shouted, in a voice louder than his mother had ever heard him use since he was bitten at four years old!  
  
"Hi Remus. How are you?" She leant down and kissed her slender child.  
  
"I'm fabulous!" He announced bouncing back. "This is Sirius, James and Peter. They're friends with me. And I was wondering if they could come one week in the summer."  
  
Gabrielle Lupin laughed delightedly at her son's enthusiasm. "Hello boys. I'll tell you what, if Remus has your contact details we'll get in touch and arrange something." She then had to wait for about another ten minutes as the boys talked excitedly and hugged each other at least ten times before Remus would finally get into the car.  
  
"Oh Mum, I love it so much, and my friends, well they found out and they're fine and they won't tell anyone they've all promised. I've never been so happy in my entire life!"  
  
She smiled in the seat beside him. "Well if you're happy, I'm ecstatic! I'm really happy for you, just be careful about your lycanthropy make sure you don't fall out with your friends and them tell."  
  
"I know they won't Mum, everything's going to be fine and I can't wait to see them again in the holidays!"  
  
She laughed again, never having known her quiet son be so lively and vibrant. "You've only just left them."  
  
"I know but I miss them already, I really do!" 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter2  
  
"Looks like our parents get on well anyhow." James said nodding at his and Sirius' parents chatting amiably with Remus' as they shopped for new books in Diagon Alley.  
  
"Shame Peter's still away on holiday with his parents. The last few days have been really good haven't they, but it's not the same without all of us." Remus said reflectively, still having had the best days of his life with his friends in his own home, something he never thought he'd be able to experience.  
  
"You had me!" Sirius said over-dramatically flinging his arms around Remus and kissing him repetitively on the cheeks.  
  
"Sirius!" His father bellowed while his mother shook her head in dismay. "He'll never change will he?" Ralph Black said. "Always has to be a total exhibitionist!" Remus' mother smiled at her son laughing with his friends.  
  
"He has done the world of good for Remus, he was so quiet and withdrawn when he went to Hogwarts, he's like a new boy."  
  
"Sirius can be thoroughly ludicrous though! He has the strangest ideas on how a family of such standing in the community as our own should operate. He really lacks respect and I'm just glad he has James to balance him." Mrs Black added, "He's a sensible boy isn't he?" She trailed off as James picked Sirius up and promptly dropped him.  
  
"Mum, Dad! Look! Can I have an owl, please, loads of people have got them, and just think of all the letters I'd send if I didn't have to use a scabby school owl! James got one for his birthday and Remus has had one since first year!" Sirius pleaded with his parents, having no intentions of sending them lots of letters, he didn't have a particularly good relationship with them.  
  
"Not a chance Sirius!" His father said firmly. "You can't even look after yourself let alone an owl, the answer is no!" Sirius looked thoroughly annoyed but knew better than to argue with his father or even try to plead with his mother.  
  
"James also got a new broom for his birthday, something tells me he's a spoilt little boy!" Remus joked trying to lift the tone seeing the despondent look on Sirius face.  
  
"Oh yeah, born with a silver spoon in my mouth me, spoilt rotten!" James grinned.  
  
***  
  
"Remember this time last year?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Yeah we were all really nervous and thought we could cast thousands of spells and I can hardly even transfigure a quill into a stick!" Peter laughed.  
  
"I was actually thinking more about me holding Remus over the side of the train throwing up."  
  
"Please don't remind me of that! I was terrified you'd guess about me after I went and puked when you talked about hunting werewolves."  
  
"Erm yeah, I'm really sorry about that."  
  
"So you should be!" Remus said trying desperately hard to look serious. Sirius' face dropped momentarily before Remus burst out laughing and was promptly punched in the arm.  
  
"Bastard!"  
  
"Hey! Be nice or I might have to bite you!"  
  
"Ohh..I'm so scared. James, James, help me please, I'm a damsel in distress."  
  
"Still a melodramatic imbecile I see!" A sly voice sounded, making all four boys look up from the act they were playing and Sirius removing himself from James' lap where he had plonked himself.  
  
"Malfoy, still a pompous shit I see!" Sirius replied hardly missing a beat. "Oh and the greasy side kick, see you still haven't found a bath Sevvy babes! Difficult though I suppose to get clean when you spend the majority of your time with your head residing in Luscious Lucius' arse!"  
  
Peter snorted with laughter. "Alright Pettigrew no need to sound like a pig as well as look like one!" Malfoy spoke scathingly. "Let's get out of here Severus, don't want to catch anything!"  
  
***  
  
"I really can't stomach any food!" James said trying desperately hard to swallow his second mouthful of toast.  
  
"Need your strength Jamie boy!" Sirius said shovelling piles of bacon and eggs down his throat. Peter nodded, mouth too full to speak.  
  
"I don't know how you can eat Sirius! We're going to be trying for the Gryffindor team in about an hour! It's the most important moment of our school life so far!"  
  
Remus raised his eyebrows and tried not to grin. He could understand house glory but he didn't think it was that important!  
  
"I think I might just die if I don't get picked." James slumped forwards with his head in his arms. "It's all I've ever wanted!"  
  
Remus couldn't help but giggle this time. "Honestly James you're as bad as Sirius! Such a dramatist!"  
  
"Oh Remus you just don't understand!" Sirius said in defence of James. "The honour, the glory, the thought of shoving Malfoy's nose in it when we hammer Slytherin in the first match!"  
  
Passing a sideways glance at Peter, Remus replied "Ah. now I get you, makes so much more sense now!"  
  
"James is doing well isn't he? And why is it that Sirius can lark about and still be really good at everything?"  
  
Remus jumped, having just been staring at the people flying high above them but lost in thought. "Hmm, yeah, suppose.OOOH look out!" Remus winced as the bludger cannoned straight into James' leg.  
  
"That looked nasty." Peter stated what the rest of the stands were thinking.  
  
Remus and Peter hurried through the corridors to the hospital wing, well as fast as Peter could run, so they didn't exactly move at lightning speed! When the two fair-headed boys arrived Madame Pomfrey was just leaving James after giving him a potion of some description.  
  
James had his glasses off and his face was tear stained. Remus didn't think he'd ever seen anyone look so vulnerable in his whole life. "What did Madame Pomfrey say? Is it broken?" Peter asked finally finding his voice, embarrassed by James' tears, the older boy always appearing so steady and strong.  
  
"She's given me a potion to fix it...need to stay in tonight...really hurts...not as much as not getting on the team though!" He snivelled and gratefully accepted Remus' hanky.  
  
"It could be worse Jamie." Remus said tactfully. "At least your leg's going to be ok, and you can always try again next year. If it's any consolation I thought you were doing really well!" James nodded knowing snapping at Remus as he might have liked to do would achieve nothing. Anyway, Remus was only trying to make him feel better, it wasn't possible to feel any worse he thought!  
  
"Merlin James!" Sirius came bursting through the hospital wing door, sweaty and muddy from the quidditch pitch. "You nearly made me fall of my broom! What a fright. How are you?"  
  
James scowled and chewed on his lip determined not to let Sirius see how upset he had been and still was. "Alright. My leg will fix over night."  
  
Sirius nodded. "Well Jamie my son, you are looking at the new Gryffindor beater so the honour of our little group of friends is still in place do not fear!"  
  
James nodded and tried to look pleased for his friend despite feeling like the jealous green monster. "Alright for some." Came out of his mouth when he had meant to just say well done.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sirius asked, his high spirits rapidly deflating at the glowering face of his friend.  
  
"I've practised all year while you've messed around and still you get on the team and I'm just playing a spectator sport from the fucking stand!" James shouted not caring who heard him. "It's not fair!"  
  
Sirius saw red and lost his temper. "Well it's not my fault you can't see even with your specs and consequentially a bludger hit you!"  
  
"It isn't my fault you're as arrogant as Lucius Malfoy but you still are!" James fired back.  
  
Sirius opened his mouth to retaliate but shut it quickly as the nurse came bustling over. "What on Earth is going on here? Mr Potter needs his rest, he has had a nasty fright! Now I suggest seeing as you boys cannot behave responsibly you leave!"  
  
"I was just going!" Sirius announced turning on his heel and marching off nose in the air.  
  
Peter shuffled off, afraid of Madame Pomphrey's beady glare.  
  
"Don't worry Jamie, he was just over excited, he didn't mean it. And neither did you if you are honest." Remus squeezed his friend's shoulder. "I'll try to pop by and see you later." James nodded not trusting himself to speak for the lump in his throat. He'd had an awful day.  
  
***  
  
"How long is this going to go on for Siri?" Remus asked as they took their seats in potions, himself now working with Sirius since James and the other raven haired boy were barely acknowledging each others presence since the quidditch team trials three weeks earlier.  
  
"Until he apologises!" Sirius growled.  
  
James overhearing muttered to Peter "Well if he thinks I'm apologising he's very much mistaken! He pretty much said I was blind. And I know I need glasses but there's no need to rub it in!"  
  
Peter sighed, it wasn't terribly nice for him and Remus being stuck between the pair who were equally as proud as each other and wouldn't apologise because their pride was like a brick wall in the way! The lesson began, making aging potions. Sirius, angry about the whole situation with James wasn't in the best of moods to begin with. This worsened when he realised that Snape and Malfoy were seated behind him and just the sound of their slimy self- righteous voices was making his skin crawl. Remus resigned himself to chopping up the ingredients and not speaking to Sirius for fear of his wrath.  
  
"Lupin doesn't need an aging potion. He's an old git anyhow. Look at his hair Lucius, flecked with grey already, a fair bit of it too, so ugly on a person our age don't you think?" Remus heard and looked down, embarrassed by the silver streaks through his hair due to the wolf in him.  
  
Sirius, however, had just been looking for an excuse to vent some of his frustration about the whole situation with James and turned around wand in hand to an unsuspecting Snape. "Folliculus Removo!" He hissed.  
  
The whole classroom erupted into laughter as Snape's hand flew to his now bald head.  
  
"And you could still fry your breakfast off it even without the greasy mop! Maybe you should offer yourself to the house elves? At least then you'd be half useful!"  
  
"SILENCE!" Professor Brewer's voice bellowed over the racket in the dungeon and the second years all fell silent at once. The potions master flicked his wand towards Snape leaving him with a head full of hair once again before turning on Sirius and Remus. "You two will be in here tonight for detention at 9pm sharp! Cleaning all of the cauldrons without any magic!"  
  
Sirius nodded, knowing fine well he would be punished for his misdemeanour but not actually caring. He did feel a bit guilty about getting Remus into trouble. "Sorry Rem, it wasn't you, you shouldn't have to do it."  
  
Remus shrugged. "Doesn't matter, you only did it to defend me."  
  
***  
  
"My wrist's aching!" Sirius whined as he scrubbed what felt like the millionth cauldron.  
  
"Tell me about it!" Remus agreed lethargically reaching for the next one, which was equally as filthy with ingredients practically welded to the sides.  
  
"Remy?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"I know you don't like talking about it but, well, would you tell me what it's like when you transform." Remus sighed. "You don't have to." Sirius added quickly not sure whether he'd made a mistake in asking such a sensitive question, "I just wanted to be able to understand exactly what you go through every month."  
  
Remus put down the cauldron he was scrubbing. "It's not easy for me to talk about really but I understand you wanting to know. It's horrible really. In the days leading up to the moon I start to feel really fractious and irritable as the wolf starts to take over me, well I suppose the wolf is me, so the human side of me. Then when Madame Pomfrey takes me to the Whomping Willow, as you know, I go through the passageway into the little room in the shack where the physical side of it starts. It gets really lonely in there, just waiting for the inevitable. My teeth grow and my skin stretches. It burns Sirius; it feels like it's going to tear apart. My bones crack as they change shape and the itchiness of all the hair sprouting is really indescribable!"  
  
He took a deep breath before continuing. Sirius was starting to wonder if he'd made the wrong decision, this sounded horrendous. "And the screams that they hear from the shack, the noises that make people think it's terribly haunted, well that's me, crying in pain. I try not to but I can't help it, it just hurts so badly."  
  
Remus coughed against the lump in his throat and blinked hard to stop the tears in his eyes from spilling. He'd never talked about this before and although it was difficult it somehow felt right to tell Sirius, to share the most private, well-kept secrets about himself with the long-haired boy.  
  
"You don't have to continue." Sirius said, surprised to hear his own voice was wobbly.  
  
"No, I want to. The wolf, it gets really angry because it's trapped. It wants blood Sirius, when I'm like that I want to kill people. It's dreadful because as a person I'm really easy going and placid, I wouldn't hurt a fly and this thing takes over me and all I want to do is go crazy, explode. And so I attack myself. That's why I have so many wounds because I throw myself around, bite and claw at my own skin until I bleed."  
  
Remus felt Sirius' hand on his shoulder and smiled, grateful of his support. "Then I tend to just fall asleep, exhausted, and when I wake I'm human again, naked, vulnerable and sore. Madame Pomfrey comes to get me and fixes me up. She's wonderful about it all. All the teachers here are, particularly Dumbledore, he's really kind to let someone with my condition, my lycanthropy in here. I feel sick and I ache all over afterwards. Sometimes it's worse than others, it all depends just how violent the wolf gets I suppose. I have to live with it; I know that now. I just wish they could find something to make it a little easier." A single silvery tear slid down Remus' pale cheek.  
  
Sirius wrapped his arms around the golden headed boy, realising he too had tears slipping from his eyes. "Oh Remus, you poor soul, you're so brave and strong." Remus squeezed Sirius, recognizing this had been as hard for Sirius to hear as it had been for him to say.  
  
"Not really." Remus said softly. "Just accepting. I suppose you have to be."  
  
Sirius nodded but was still in awe of the courage Remus must have to go through that every month. "I wish I could be more like you Remy. You're so sensible, sensitive and strong. I'm just good at playing the fool and upsetting people! Even my own parents think I'm a waste of space, they're probably right! Saying that, they're far from perfect."  
  
Remus pulled Sirius' black locks back from his face where they had stuck due to the dampness of his salty tears. "Don't ever want to be someone else. Everyone is special because they are the person that they are. You're wonderful as you are! Alright?"  
  
Sirius nodded, saddened by the wise way that Remus spoke, feeling it was almost sorrowful that someone so young had to be so mature because of the way they were. "Well thanks Remus, I'll keep it to myself. But if you ever need me to do anything I'm there alright?"  
  
Remus thought for a moment. "There is one thing. Will you make up with Jamie? It's difficult for me and Peter stuck between you and anyhow, you're both miserable not talking to one another. Swallow your pride Sirius. It makes you the better person for doing it."  
  
"You're right..as usual! I hate that!" Remus laughed.  
  
***  
  
James and Sirius had settled their differences as Remus had asked much to everyone's relief. A few months had passed and the school year was going well. That is, apart from a minor hiccup where Argus Filch had caught them sneaking around the castle at 2am in the morning looking for secret passageways.  
  
They realised they had become a bit too cock-sure because had they taken the invisibility cloak he would never have seen Peter's bright red pyjamas which is what Sirius swore got them caught. It was Sirius' birthday that morning so everyone was awake early because he wanted to open his presents.  
  
"Oh Merlin!" He exclaimed, eyes nearly popping out of his head. "Sirius, I'm proud of your achievements in making the house quidditch team and know how much you wanted this." The note accompanying the new model Nimbus 1800 read from his Uncle Alphard. Sirius glanced quickly over at James, worried in case the jealousy would be back but there was just a look of sheer admiration on his face.  
  
"That is wonderful Sirius. Lock it away or I might steal it!"  
  
"Eurgh!" Came the next comment as he opened his grandmother's present."When will she learn that when I say I don't like brown itchy jumpers that means I don't want a new one every bloody year! Oh well never mind, at least she sent some sweets as well! Every cloud has a silver lining."  
  
Quickly he moved onto the next present. "It doesn't have a label." Sirius mused as he tore it open. "ARGH!" Sirius flung the parcel away from himself as a label fell out.  
  
"Happy Birthday Black, have a horrid day! Malfoy" The dead snake lay in the middle of the floor. James cast a quick spell to get rid of it. "That slimy bastard. How did he know I hated snakes!"  
  
Peter shook his head. "Not sure. But James should have left it. We could have strangled Malfoy with it!"  
  
The rest of his presents weren't nearly so bad. A book from James about quidditch tactics and techniques, "I have to make my contribution to the Gryffindor team skills after all." And a framed photograph of the four friends taken down by the lake messing around from Peter along with a box of Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans.  
  
"What have your parents got for you?" Peter asked, suddenly realising nothing had been opened from them. "If your uncle got you a racing broom Merlin knows what you'll get from your parents!"  
  
Sirius looked flustered as he muttered under his breath. "They don't really get me birthday presents. Erm, they think I'm too disobedient to deserve them anymore!"  
  
Peter laughed loudly. "Oh Sirius you do make me laugh!" He stopped laughing suddenly as he realised Sirius was being honest.  
  
"Get dressed." Remus commanded, taking charge of the situation, trying to alleviate both of the boys' embarassment. "Then we'll go and I'll show you my present." Intrigued Sirius hurriedly threw on his clothes.  
  
"This way." Remus led his three friends across the grounds of the school.  
  
"Erm Remy, where are you taking us?"  
  
"You'll see." The cheerful voice came from in front of him.  
  
"Why are we in the owlery?"  
  
"Because.." He trailed off and pointed at a beautfil Tawny owl. "Meet Athena. Your new pet."  
  
Sirius was, for possibly the first time in his life, speechless. "Oh Remus, she's beautiful but I can't possibly. It's far too much. She'd be too expensive!"  
  
Remus shrugged his shoulders. "I wanted to get her for you. I knew how much you wanted an owl. Anyhow, I've been saving my money for years and there's nothing I wanted for myself. I wanted to get her for you."  
  
Remus was nearly knocked off his feet as Sirius flung himself on him. "Remus I love you alright! Thanks so much."  
  
"Well, at least you don't have an excuse now not to send thank you letters to all of your family for your presents, and yes, that does include your grandma for the jumper. And if you really want to thank me you can share your sweets with me and not eat them all yourself like Peter did last year on his birthday!" Remus said with a meaningful glance in Peter's direction, who was suddenly finding the floor of the owlery to be of great interest.  
  
***  
  
"James, I'm sorry this is short notice but I really don't have any choice." David Abbot, captain of the quidditch team, said running up to him out of breath. "Lucinda, one of the chasers, well she's come down with flu and the pepper up isn't working as well as it might and I know she's not happy because it would have been her last match before leaving the school, but I need to have the team in tip top condition for Saturday's match against Ravenclaw. If we win we'll get the quidditch cup!"  
  
James looked a little bewildered and David must have noticed "So I was wondering if you would mind practising with us this week and playing for the team on Saturday. If you can't don't worry, I know it's last minute and it might be a hassle."  
  
James cut him off. "A hassle? Do I mind? I've wanted this more than anything, well not Lucinda to be unwell but to play for the team. I'll see you at practise!" He punched the air and didn't even care when he was seen by Snape.  
  
"Seeing invisible men again Potter, I'd say you need your eyes testing, after all we all know they're not exactly firing on all cylinders!"  
  
***  
  
The quidditch match turned out to be a huge success with the whole school turning out to watch. Remus and Peter watched proudly from the stands as their two friends flew high above them. James scored 80 points while Sirius saved the day on a number of occasions by firing bludgers towards the opposing Ravenclaw team. And it was with great delight when the Gryffindor seeker caught the snitch. "Gryffindor wins! 260 points to 90! Gryffindor wins the quidditch cup!"  
  
Dinner that night was a particularly frivolous affair at the Gryffindor table, having won both the house and quidditch cups. "Well we've all passed our exams, it's the summer holidays and a feast now. Life's good!" Sirius laughed swigging pumpkin juice from his goblet. "Shame we couldn't find any alcohol really to spice things up a bit though." He added as an after thought.  
  
"I'm starving!" Peter announced. "I wish everyone else would hurry up and get here so that we could start!" At that moment the second year Gryffindor girls approached the boys at the table.  
  
"Hi girls." Sirius said, ever the flirt.  
  
"James you were fabulous out there today. You made me proud to be a Gryffindor!" A red headed girl named Lily said throwing her arms around James and planting a kiss on his cheek before walking off with her friends giggling wildly and whistling at James.  
  
"Ok James, place your tongue back in your mouth." Sirius giggled.  
  
Remus joined in the laughing. "Well he's always thought she was pretty, he first starting looking at her in the sorting ceremony.  
  
"I did not!" James argued but the flushed colour of his cheeks gave the game away.  
  
"Well." Remus began. "I think we can safely say that makes a pretty good ending to a pretty good year!" 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3  
  
Third year began much as any other year except more homework was being given due to the extra two subjects they'd had to take. James and Sirius didn't really mind, both being highly intelligent, the extra work didn't pose a problem to them. Remus, although he wouldn't admit it, rather enjoyed it. He got to read more books this way. Although not naturally as clever as his two raven haired friends it was widely acknowledged that Remus was the most studious. Their fourth friend Peter, however, was rather lacking in the school- work department and had struggled through both the previous two years and was horrified by the extra homework and was convinced if it weren't for Remus' patience that he would have failed in all subjects. Consequentially it was late that night when the four of them retreated to bed.  
  
Apart from Remus, none of them seemed aware of their bodies and changed in front of each other into their pyjamas. The young werewolf was very conscious of his scars and thin body so always got changed behind the curtains on his bed. Before doing so though, he couldn't help but notice that James and Sirius had both grown and Sirius in particular had filled out, not in a Peter type of way, in a muscular toned sense. He looked nice. Remus realised he had just thought his friend was attractive and scuttled behind his curtains and pulled off his clothes, aware his face had changed from its usual eggshell pallor to a red as deep as the Gryffindor drapes in the dormitory.  
  
The following morning over breakfast Remus sat quietly, which wasn't particularly unusual, so nobody seemed to notice anything different. However, it wasn't the normal sleepiness keeping him from participating in the game between James and Sirius, who were trying to feed each other with both eyes closed and consequentially getting food all over, but deep thoughts. What had made him look at Sirius the previous night, why not at the other two? Ok, well at least why not James, Peter didn't exactly have much going for him, horrible as it may seem. It wasn't as if he hadn't seen Sirius just clad in his underwear before, hell he'd seen him stark naked regularly! Saying that Sirius wasn't shy was a massive understatement. But last night had brought a definite blush to his cheeks as he took in Sirius' strong chest and broadening shoulders.  
  
He glanced over at Sirius, who was now howling with laughter, his oceanic eyes twinkling with glee at James, who now had baked beans down his front and was getting up to hurry back upstairs before transfiguration to get changed, McGonnagal didn't approve of tardiness! He felt colour rising in his cheeks once again. Why was Sirius so good-looking? Remus knew he shouldn't be thinking like this, he wasn't gay was he? So why did he look upon Sirius as gorgeous?  
  
He was jolted from his thoughts by Peter. "I'd eat up if I was you or we'll be late."  
  
Transfiguration wasn't one of Remus' favourite subjects. He was better at Defence Against the Dark Arts. Sirius and James, however, were much better. In the past James had been better at Charms but in second year he got the highest mark in the year from McGonnagal for his Transfiguration exam.  
  
"Settle down!" McGonnagal came sweeping into the classroom and everyone fell silent. Although she was head of Gryffindor house she had no qualms at taking points from its pupils should she see it fit. "Today we are going to learn about Animagi." She stated with her crisp voice. "This is a particularly difficult transformation, above the level of wizards and witches of your own ability."  
  
Suddenly in her place sat a tabby cat and as quickly as she had turned into it she changed back. "To be an animagus you must be registered with the Ministry of Magic. There are very few registered cases as it is such a complicated transformation. What the animagi spell allows a person to do is to transform from a human to an animal."  
  
Remus nudged James who was sitting beside him listening to McGonnagal intently. "I can do that without the spell." James nodded and smiled back, glad that Remus was less touchy about his condition now with his friends.  
  
"Mr. Lupin! If you have something to say would you mind sharing it with the class?" Remus looked down at his desk. "I thought not!" She pursed her lips at him as he glanced up apologetically.  
  
Later, when Remus was in the library, Sirius spoke to James and Peter. "I don't know what you think about this, and it's probably just about impossible but I think it is definitely worth a try." He looked determined and his eyes gleamed.  
  
"Sirius, we've already had detention four times this term in just as many weeks!" Peter said nervously, not liking standing up to Sirius but often concerned by his rashness.  
  
"No you idiot! Listen!"  
  
James looked up from 'Quidditch through the Ages' "I'm listening."  
  
"It's nothing that breaks school rules, well actually...erm ok I take that back it kind of breaks the law!" Sirius thought momentarily that this wasn't such a clever idea after all, but then had a change of heart and went on anyhow, despite the look of terror on Peter's podgy face. "Why don't we try to become animagi?" He waited a grin on his face thinking this was actually a very good idea.  
  
"Yeah!" James said to Sirius' delight, which was rapidly erased. "Let's rob Gringotts!"  
  
Sirius looked offended. "It's not that bad James! I mean, I know we're too young to register and all that, but it's hardly like we're causing harm! But if you two aren't interested that's fine, I'll do it myself!" He said with a touch of huffiness.  
  
What's the point though?" Peter asked, worried by the hurt look on Sirius' face. Sirius, when upset could be rather volatile to say the least!  
  
"The point is, Remus goes through his transformation every month and he's lonely and scared!"  
  
"And? I know it's awful for him but there's nothing we can do, I mean none of us can go with him, he'd bite us! And much as I love Remy, I don't really fancy becoming a werewolf myself!" James said with a tone filled with logic.  
  
Sirius sighed. "And here was me thinking you'd have cared enough about Remus to have read a little more into his condition!"  
  
James slammed his book shut. "Are you forgetting it was actually me who worked out what Remus was? It was me that read all about it. Anyhow, I still don't see what you're getting at?"  
  
Sirius scowled. "Animals can't become werewolves! Only humans can!"  
  
James, feeling annoyed by Sirius, snapped at him. "An animagus isn't an animal; it's a human in animal form!" Peter sat quietly, not wanting to get caught in an exchange between the two of them.  
  
"You're wrong!" Sirius stated. "Anyhow, it'll probably never work." He added calming down, realising having an argument with James wasn't the way forward. "I just think we should read into it. It'd make Remus really happy. He's done so much for all of us in the last few years it's a small sacrifice to make doing a bit of research into it isn't it."  
  
James' face softened, he understood what Sirius was meaning and knew he was only doing it because his heart was in the right place. "Alright, we'll give it a go. But we shouldn't say anything to Remus. If it isn't going to work I don't want us to be getting his hopes up."  
  
***  
  
"I wish that James and Sirius would get back from quidditch practise so we can go!" Peter said impatiently. "I can't wait to see what Honeydukes is like!" It was the first Hogsmeade weekend that Saturday and Remus and Peter were waiting eagerly for the return of their two friends.  
  
"I'm knackered!" Sirius said, flinging down his things as he came into the bedroom.  
  
"Just have a quick wash and then we'll be ready." James puffed, red in the face.  
  
Sirius pulled on a pair of hugging jeans. Remus tried to look the other way as Sirius dressed but found that his eyes kept being dragged back to the trim figure before him.  
  
"Does my bum look big in this?" Sirius winked at Remus, noticing him looking.  
  
Stuttering, Remus replied "It looks lovely." Merlin! Had he just said what he thought he had? He'd meant it looked fine, not lovely! Even if that's what he'd secretly thought!  
  
Sirius laughed at Remus' flushed face. "Don't be embarrassed Remy, you've got good taste, I think my rear end is rather lovely too!"  
  
Remus swallowed hard. Was Sirius flirting with him? He shook his head and turned away. Don't be ridiculous Remus; he flirts with everyone. Not that he blamed Sirius, if he looked half as good as Sirius did, he thought, he'd flirt lots because he would have the confidence. As it was, he felt ugly next to Sirius, scrawny and scarred, with grey in his hair. Even if Sirius did like boys, which he didn't, Remus assured himself, because of all the girls he flirted with these days, he wouldn't be interested in someone such as himself.  
  
The four boys collapsed into a booth in The Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade after some furious shopping. Sirius had bought himself some exploding stink pellets "To throw at Snape" along with a set of wizard chess, they would all enjoy playing that.  
  
James had bought a cleaning kit for his broomstick, knowing full well that Sirius would no doubt help himself to it, not that he minded sharing it with his best friend. Remus had had to be dragged from the bookshop, quite literally, when James and Sirius threatened to pick him up and physically remove him, but he had still managed to buy three new books, having been saving his money up for this occassion. However the biggest buy of the day was enough sweets to feed an army. Between the four of them they must have had at least 20 different types of sweets, enough to last a whole term, but they knew they'd probably have eaten them by the end of the week!  
  
"Four butterbeers darling" Sirius said with a wink and a charming smile at Madame Rosmerta, the young and ample-chested barmaid. Remus' heart sunk. He didn't know why he let it bother him. Sirius had, after all, behaved like this for years but somehow now it was different. He felt.jealous!  
  
"Hi James." The pretty redhead girl, Lily, said as she and her friends walked past them. "You were good in quidditch practise this morning. You too Sirius." She smiled at them both. "Anyhow, we're just going to have a quick drink before we go back to school. See you later." She left, leaving James blushing.  
  
"Sirius? Can I talk to you?" James asked that night after Remus and Peter had gone up for a shower.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
James was shuffling on his bed, finding his sherbet lemons very interesting.  
  
Sirius noticed and looked up from the broomstick kit he'd been looking at. "What's worrying you?"  
  
James sighed and looked like he was gathering courage. "It's a bit embarrassing. I...I...I like Lily Evans."  
  
Sirius looked perplexed. "Yeah, she's a nice enough girl, her friends are a bit giggly."  
  
"No." James said his ears going red.  
  
"Oh!" Sirius said it suddenly dawning on him. "You like her."  
  
James nodded and looked away. "She's really pretty and she's always so friendly. I just don't know if I should do anything about it. I mean she kissed me at the end of last year on the cheek but I mean, it probably means nothing."  
  
Sirius looked thoughtful. "She came up to you today in the inn though, and she seems to like you too."  
  
James wrinkled his nose thoughtfully, making his glasses slip. Pushing them back up he shook his head. "I dunno Sirius, she spoke to you as well."  
  
"She only spoke to me as an afterthought though. I think she likes you as well. Anyhow, she always smiles at you. If I was you, I'd talk to her. Just ask her if she'll help with charms or something, she's good at that."  
  
James shook his head in disagreement. "I'm quite good at charms, it used to be my best subject; it'd look obvious."  
  
"It's meant to be James! Either that or just ask her if she'll go out with you!"  
  
James nodded. "Alright I'll ask her tomorrow. Thanks Siri."  
  
"Anytime my dearest. Agony Uncle Sirius is here to help with all these teenage angsty situations!" James attacked him with a pillow.  
  
***  
  
The next morning James was up earlier than usual and was surprised to see Remus also awake. "You're up early."  
  
"Had a funny dream." Remus said.  
  
"Poor you, I hate nightmares."  
  
Remus nodded, knowing he hadn't exactly lied. In fact, he'd enjoyed the dream rather a lot more than he should have done.  
  
"What happened in it?" James enquired pulling on his clothes.  
  
"Can't really remember." Remus lied, knowing he could never tell the truth to James, he'd think he was crazy.  
  
Sirius stretched languidly and pulled himself from the warmth of his bed and removed his pyjamas before wrapping a towel around his slender hips. "Going for a shower. Wait for me before you go to breakfast. You'd better wake up Pete, you know what he's like for getting out of bed."  
  
James made no move to awaken Peter from his sleep, his eyes watching Remus carefully. "Rem?" He questioned.  
  
"What?" Remus jumped turning quickly, realising with horror that he'd yet again been staring at Sirius.  
  
"Do you fancy Sirius?"  
  
Remus feigned a surprised look, amazed when he felt it had come off all right, when really he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. "Where the hell did you get that from?" He struggled to prevent his voice from shaking from the fear at his secret being discovered.  
  
"You were staring at him without his clothes on."  
  
"I was not!" Remus retorted hotly. "Honestly James! What a ridiculous suggestion. We're both boys for goodness sake!"  
  
Remus laughed, although James noticed it didn't sound like the usual tinkle, more of a hollow forced laugh. He wondered what was really going on in Remus head, but his amber eyes which usually reflected his thoughts had shut down, blocking out any emotion, realising he'd have to be more careful and discreet in future.  
  
"Lily?" James called after her on the way to his first class, muggle studies ("It can't be that hard." Said Sirius. "It'll be interesting." Said Remus)  
  
"Hi James." She smiled broadly, showing perfect white teeth.  
  
"Can I talk to you?" James wished her friends would go away.  
  
"Of course." She noticed he was holding back. "You go ahead, I'll catch you up." She said to her friends who were looking appreciatively at James.  
  
"I..." James cleared his throat as she looked imploringly into his deep eyes. "I think you're really pretty and I was wondering if you'd." He paused, wishing he had Sirius' fearlessness at talking to the opposite sex. "If you'd go out with me?" He blushed furiously.  
  
"That's really sweet of you James. I'm really sorry but I'm sort of attached already. Matthew Brown, you know, the seeker on the Hufflepuff team?" James nodded sadly, feeling incredibly stupid. "I really am sorry James." She said looking a little guilty and pulled him into an amicable hug. "You're lovely James, it isn't you, and I'm really flattered. If the situation were different I'd have been delighted."  
  
James nodded feeling thoroughly deflated. "I'll see you in History of Magic then." He dejectedly headed towards his lesson wishing he'd just kept quiet.  
  
***  
  
Sirius didn't know why he couldn't sleep. It was about six in the morning late in March that year. He looked around the dormitory. Peter was, as usual, snoring. His round body curled up, practically covered, apart from a tuft of his washed out blond hair. James too was fast asleep, his mouth slightly ajar, lean body stretched out with the covers around his waist. The fourth bed in the room was empty.  
  
Last night had been the full moon.  
  
Remus should have been back in human form now. Usually he would bring himself back through the passageway and head to the hospital wing. Sirius went to the window, wondering if he would see Remus coming back through the branches of the Whomping Willow. He must have sat there for nearly half an hour, wondering perhaps if Remus was already in the hospital wing having his cuts bathed when suddenly the boy crawled from under the tree.  
  
Sirius' breath caught in his throat as he saw Remus pull himself on hands and knees out of harm's reach from the lethal tree, before falling forwards lying on the ground.  
  
Not even thinking to pull a cloak around himself the black haired boy flew down the stairs from the dormitory into the common room before going through the portrait hole ignoring the fat lady's irritated tone "Just a touch early don't you think!" and haring down to the grounds and to Remus' limp body.  
  
"Remus, Remus!" He panted, falling to his own knees, not caring as the dewy grass soaked through his thin striped pyjama bottoms.  
  
Remus turned his head and groaned with the effort to look up at Sirius. "Thank goodness you're here." He managed to say, as Sirius helped him up. Remus yelped in pain as Sirius' hand pressed into a deep wound on his side.  
  
"Oh Remy, you poor little soul." Sirius felt like he could cry at the state of his best friend. He'd never seen him look so pallid and the blood from his wounds seeped through the cloak wrapped around the shivering body of the young werewolf. "Hold onto me. I'll get you to Madame Pomfrey." Sirius carefully wrapped an arm around Remus' tiny waist and helped him to put his arm over his own shoulder.  
  
"I feel sick." Remus muttered.  
  
"Poor darling." Sirius said "Just hold onto me and I'll get you into bed.  
  
"Thanks you're.." Remus gagged and Sirius gently pushed his head downwards as he threw up over both of their feet. Sirius realised at this point that he had no shoes on with an unpleasant shock! "I'm sorry." Remus wept softly.  
  
"Don't worry about it. Like I've told you before, if I remember rightly, you can't help vomiting. You've had a rough night haven't you?" Remus nodded and wiped his nose with the back of his hand. "Come on, I'm going to carry you."  
  
Remus didn't have strength to protest, as Sirius gently lifted his tired body into his arms and took him to the hospital wing. "Thanks Siri, you're so lovely."  
  
"Where've you been?" James asked, sitting up in bed and rubbing his eyes before placing his glasses on so he could focus better.  
  
"Eurgh!" Peter screwed up his face, "What's that smell?!"  
  
Sirius looked down at his pyjama bottoms. "Remus was sick on me." He took the offending garment off and explained exactly what had happened to the other two before going for a very quick shower.  
  
"Right, we should get upstairs to the hospital wing to him. He's not well bless him, I think he'd like the company." Peter was about to say something about breakfast but decided against it when James agreed with Sirius.  
  
"I think we need to really work on this whole animagi thing you know." Sirius said as they hurriedly paced towards the hospital wing. "I don't think I ever want to see him like that again, it was scary!"  
  
Peter nodded.  
  
"We need to get in the restricted section though and there is no way any of the teachers are going to trust us with our track record for causing trouble no matter how good at Transfiguration James is."  
  
James looked round before whispering. "Next full moon, when Remus isn't here, we'll get the invisibility cloak and borrow one and then copy what we need out of it while it's still dark then take it back before Madame Pince gets into the library. It shouldn't be too hard if we're careful."  
  
Remus was sat up in bed now with a cup of tea and a piece of toast he was cautiously nibbling at, not wanting to throw up again, when the other three boys rushed in. Madame Pomfrey made disapproving noises about Remus needing rest but relented when Remus begged her to let them stay.  
  
"How are you feeling?" James asked, taking in the bandages around Remus' arms, and taking a seat beside the bed. Peter sat on the other side leaving Sirius nowhere to sit down.  
  
"I've felt better." Remus smiled sheepishly. "I seem to have torn myself up a bit!"  
  
Peter, who still found it quite difficult to take that Remus bit and clawed so much at himself, sat quietly, wishing Remus would either eat the toast or give it to him, his stomach thought his throat had been cut!  
  
"Sit here." Remus shuffled over in the bed slightly to allow Sirius to sit beside him.  
  
"Thanks Rem. You really scared me there Remy, I'm so glad you're alright!" He said clasping Remus' hand and thinking how tragically beautiful he looked.  
  
"Only thanks to you." Remus squeezed Sirius hand back, never wanting to let him go. "I felt like I was going to die." A sob caught in his throat. Peter looked away, always uncomfortable when people cried.  
  
"Come here." Sirius sounded soft and gentle as he reached out and held Remus, tenderly stroking circles on Remus' shuddering back.  
  
"You were so kind Sirius."  
  
Sirius spoke softly into Remus' ear. "I only did what you'd have done for me if it was the other way round. I couldn't just leave you there now could I?"  
  
James watched the scene before his eyes. He'd always been Sirius' best friend from childhood and now it felt as if he was drifting away from him. He didn't resent this, somehow the way in which they were moving apart wasn't in a loss of friendship, it was something deeper between Sirius and Remus, the pair seemed to have some deep routed connection that appeared delicately special.  
  
***  
  
"A Guide to the Wizarding World's most complex Transfigurations." James read.  
  
"Sounds good." Sirius answered. "Let's get out of here and have a look." They bustled off towards the dormitory. Now they had grown it was getting increasingly difficult to fit all of them underneath the invisibility cloak and keep everything fully concealed. It was even more difficult when all four of them were together but tonight Remus was in the Shrieking Shack.  
  
Walking along the corridor once upstairs Sirius, who was in front, stopped dead suddenly, causing James to tread on his foot. "OW!" Sirius yelped before he could stop himself.  
  
"Students!" They heard footsteps coming up behind them.  
  
"Filch!" Peter hissed, feeling his legs getting weak beneath him, Filch always gave such awful punishments! Picking up pace they strode on, hoping to get through the doorway before Filch caught them up, it would be awful if he should bump into them when they were invisible, the cloak would no doubt be confiscated, along with the book.  
  
"Is there a problem Mr. Filch?" James thought his heart would stop beating. Professor McGonnagal stood in the doorway, which they wanted to get through. They'd had it!  
  
"Hold onto me!" Hissed Peter reaching for his wand. Sirius braced himself for whatever damage Peter was about to do. "Acendio!" He tapped the statue of the witch beside him and suddenly they disappeared down into a passageway, out of harm's reach."  
  
James slumped down against the side of the dusty tunnel. "Where did that come from?" He asked a look of sheer admiration on his face. That was bloody brilliant Pete! Question is where are we?"  
  
Peter flushed with pride, it was unusual for him to do anything groundbreaking, that tended to be Sirius' job! "I don't know, I just remembered from somewhere that some statues lead to secret tunnels and if you say 'Acendio' they open." He shrugged.  
  
"Don't let me ever hear you say you're thick again!" Sirius hooted with laughter. "Pete you are the man! Now let's see where this goes, we might find something interesting!"  
  
"This was a bad idea! We should have just waited 15 minutes and got back out!" Peter wheezed as they started uphill after walking for what seemed like an hour with only the "Lumos" light from their wands.  
  
"Shit!" Sirius winced as his head thumped off something. Directing his wand up he realised it was the handle of a trap door.  
  
"Not your night is it Siri? First your foot and now your head!" Sirius shrugged. "Better than poor Remus."  
  
James nodded before directing his own wand at the door "Alohamora!" Wrapping the cloak around themselves again they proceeded through the door.  
  
"Where are we?" Peter asked.  
  
"I think." James' face took on a look of excitement. "We're in the cellar in Honeydukes!"  
  
Sirius laughed. "How much is Remus going to wish he'd been here?!"  
  
"I'm starving." Peter grinned. "It wouldn't hurt if we all just took one thing would it?"  
  
James looked as if he was considering this as he could see Peter's eyes nearly popping out in glee. "Only one each alright, if we take lots it'll be obvious."  
  
Peter helped himself to a small packet of chocoballs while James took a sugar quill.  
  
"I'll just have a bar of Honeydukes chocolate." Sirius said reaching out and slipping it into a pocket in his pyjama top.  
  
"I'd have thought you'd get some pepper imps, you like those."  
  
Sirius shook his head. "It's not for me, I'm going to give it to Remus in the morning. I'm going to go down to the willow again in the morning and get him. I know how much he likes this stuff and since he's missing out I think it's only fair."  
  
James looked thoughtful. Just what exactly was going on with those two? They'd become increasingly strange over the last two terms.  
  
***  
  
"Why did I ever take Muggle studies?" Peter whined trying to revise.  
  
"Because we did?" Remus suggested, leaning over and trying to help Peter understand how a dishwasher worked.  
  
"None of us are muggle born so what ever possessed us?" Peter continued, stressed to death with the extra work he had to learn for his exams, having struggled in the past.  
  
"It isn't that difficult Pete. I mean they're muggles, it isn't as if they do magic, it isn't too complicated." Sirius said, being drawn back from his thoughts on how to get the Slytherins back for ruining his potion earlier that week. So far he'd come up with ploys to change their dormitory into a shrine to Gryffindor or to slip something into their food to make them extremely fat. But the exams had to, unfortunately, take prevalence over the tricks they'd like to play, or visits to Honeydukes through the secret passage at night.  
  
However as usual all four passed their exams, Sirius and James with flying colours and Peter scraping through by the skin of his teeth. Remus was a little disappointed with his own results, having had a particularly bad transformation not long before the exams, and therefore he couldn't work as hard as he would have liked, as Madame Pomfrey insisted he stayed in bed and did no work.  
  
"I see your standards are slipping Lupin. Not as clever as you thought are you?" Malfoy sneered as they boarded the Hogwarts express to leave for the summer.  
  
Remus shifted uncomfortably in his seat, Lucius having struck a raw nerve.  
  
"He was ill, get lost you slimy bastard!" Sirius said, a vein on his forehead throbbing, evidently more angry than usual at Malfoy and sidekick Snape.  
  
"He's always ill!" Snape smiled unpleasantly. "Would you like me to take your temperature Lupin, make sure your delicate body is capable of the trip home."  
  
Remus' heart was pounding in his chest, desperately trying to control his rapidly escalating temper.  
  
"Pick on me if you have to but leave Remus alone!" Sirius bellowed raising his wand in fury.  
  
James caught hold of Sirius' arm not wanting a huge battle. "Let it go he isn't worth it."  
  
"No!" Sirius growled. "He shouldn't be so awful to Remus!"  
  
"That's right Black, protect your little boyfriend!"  
  
"Whatever!" Sirius said, sinking, red in the face, back down as Malfoy swept out of the carriage, Snape following.  
  
"You didn't have to do that." Remus, who was as flushed as Sirius, spoke.  
  
"I did, you're my friend and he was picking on you!"  
  
The rest of the train journey was passed pleasantly playing exploding snap and eating sweets, which had once again been stocked up on at Honeydukes.  
  
"I think when we get together in the holidays we should set about making a map of the school with all the passageways we've found." Remus said when they'd finally ran out of sweets to bet with at snap.  
  
"Why though?" James asked logically. "I mean we know all of them anyhow without drawing it out and anyhow it could be found and then everyone would know!"  
  
"When we were last in Hogsmeade I was thinking about this sort of thing and got a book involving enchanted maps. We could draw the map and enchant it to show ourselves, all the teachers and say the Slytherins and that way we would have even less chance of getting caught. We'll sit down and work on it during the holidays." Everyone felt excited by the prospect of this.  
  
"See you later in the summer." Remus said sadly, not really wanting to say goodbye to his friends, not having anyone at home to be with and knowing that he would end up just sat reading for hours on end.  
  
Sirius pulled him into a tight hug and ruffled his hair. "Keep in touch. I'll send lots of letters with Athena." Remus, after saying goodbye to the other two left with Peter in the direction of their parents who were talking together, leaving James and Sirius alone.  
  
"Sirius?" He asked as he gathered all of his belongings together. "What do you think of Remus?"  
  
Sirius looked puzzled. "I like him. Don't you?"  
  
James nodded. "Of course I do, he's really nice. No, what I meant was, is there something that you.oh I don't know how to put this!" He said frustrated. "You two are particularly close, is there, well do you think well more of him than the rest of us?" Sirius laughed and clapped James on the back.  
  
"He's lovely James, he deserves so much more than he gets you know, but you're still one of my best mates, don't worry about that!" Sirius misread James point.  
  
"Oh well, see you soon mate." James said deciding pushing it wasn't a great idea.  
  
"Have a good holiday James."  
  
"Yeah you too." Sirius walked away nodding, but knowing fine well he wouldn't. His relationship with his parents became more strained by the second whenever he was at home with them.  
  
*** 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
"Thank goodness we've finally got together! I never thought we'd manage it!" James exclaimed as they threw the last of their belongings onto the floor in the Leaky Cauldron in Diagon Alley. "What with going on holiday with our parents and a certain time of the lunar cycle and stuff I thought we'd never manage it."  
  
Sirius nodded. "I know, I was starting to panic! Much as I don't get on too well with my parents they had a point suggesting this, even if it was only to get my filthy mudblood-loving arse out of their sight. It's a proper holiday for us, and it is an opportunity to get all our school things for the year and it's near to Kings Cross to get to platform nine and three quarters."  
  
"I'm not sharing a bed with Peter." Remus began, not wanting to sound horrid but just knowing he wouldn't sleep with constant snoring in his ear.  
  
"That's fine by me." Peter laughed. "I'll have this bed by the window." There were only three beds in the room where the boys would be staying for the next few days, a double and two singles.  
  
"I'm having the other single." James shouted, leaping as quickly as possible towards it and colliding with Remus, who'd obviously had the same idea. "Sorry Rem but looks like you and Sirius are sharing."  
  
Remus smiled mildly but inside was panicking. The dreams about Sirius were vivid enough already without having to share a bed with him, feel him so close!  
  
"Didn't want to share with you anyhow Potter!" Sirius pretended to be upset and pouted melodramatically. "After all you know he does wet the bed."  
  
James looked extremely indignant. "I was four years old! It's not my fault I didn't go to the toilet before bedtime, someone should have reminded me to go!" Everyone fell about laughing as James squirmed. "Anyhow Sirius, the only reason I'm not wanting to share with you is because you have terrible wet dreams."  
  
Sirius flung himself down beside James and faked sleep before suddenly thrusting his hips forward. "Ooh James...that's it...ooh...ah!!!" James blushed, as did Remus, but they all laughed heartily.  
  
"Well at least we've got the boring stuff out of the way now!" Sirius said as they sat eating ridiculously large quantities of ice cream outside of Florean Fortescue's Ice-Cream Parlour in the street, making sarcastic comments about nearly everyone who passed, or imagining them in strange situations, some ruder than others!  
  
"Books aren't boring Sirius, they're an integral part of learning and life!" Remus said defensively, having enjoyed looking at everything in Flourish and Blotts, the bookshop.  
  
"No my dear Remus, stink bombs, Fillibuster's fireworks, getting Malfoy into trouble, plotting to kill Snape, they're integral parts of life, much more important than books." Sirius said so seriously that Remus gave an exasperated sigh.  
  
"We'll get potions things tomorrow and should we go to Madame Malkin's? We need dress robes for this year it says. I wonder why?" James queried.  
  
"Dad say's it's because there is a Yule ball for the older students some years, I suppose that's why." Peter suggested not really fancying the idea of a ball. "How awful, having to ask girls to go, it'll be so embarrassing!" The short blond boy said wincing even at the thought.  
  
'How awful indeed' Remus thought 'The only person I want to go with is a boy and it'll never happen!'  
  
"I'm knackered!" James said removing his glasses and clambering into his bed.  
  
"It's so hot in here! Hope you don't mind Remus but I'm just going to bed in my boxers or I'm going to feel like I'm one of those muggle chickens in the oven!"  
  
Remus shrugged, trying not to look bothered, when all he could wish for was for Sirius to wear as many clothes as possible! They'd been reading books about making enchanted maps and had looked at the clock to find it was well after midnight!  
  
"Night all." Peter said lying down.  
  
"Yeah goodnight." Remus extinguished the candles in the room with a flick of his wand and settled himself into the bed, trying to keep his distance from Sirius, yet at the same time wishing he could have curled up to him, feeling skin against skin.  
  
Before long Peter's trademark snoring signalled he'd fallen asleep. James too had gone out like a light as soon as his head had hit the pillow. It had been a busy day! Remus was finding it difficult to settle down so tried desperately to regulate his breathing to relax.  
  
Sirius too was trying to sleep without much success. Why did he feel like this? What was it about Remus that made him so much more special than anyone else? Hearing Remus' even breathing Sirius assumed he was asleep and tentatively reached an arm out and placed it across the tawny haired boy's body, knowing this was wrong but thinking if questioned he could just feign sleep.  
  
Remus, now half asleep, felt the gentle arm surround him and couldn't help but relax into the embrace. All he could think he'd ever wanted was to have Sirius hold him as he slept and although this wasn't what he wanted it to be he could always make believe.  
  
Remus didn't know what it was that woke him at the crack of dawn but as he became aware of his strange surroundings he felt a slight pressure on him and a comforting warmth. Smiling slightly, he realised he was still cuddled against his raven-haired friend. Sirius looked very peaceful, his breathing slow and deep. Remus felt his heart skip a beat; it shouldn't be legal for somebody to be this beautiful and such a fantastic person.  
  
Then he felt his heart sink, it wasn't real, Sirius had just turned over and slipped his arm over him, it wouldn't have been a conscious decision. Sirius liked girls; he wouldn't ever willingly snuggle into him like this, would never hold him and love him. Remus was just about to attempt to get a few more hours of sleep when turning over he realised in horror that his pyjama bottoms were stuck to him, wet and clammy.  
  
"Oh shit!" He muttered quietly under his breath, swearing out of character but totally mortified that the close proximity to Sirius had brought such a reaction from his body.  
  
Carefully, he freed himself from his slumbering friend's embrace and tiptoed out of bed. Turning around, he realised in even greater alarm, that there was a damp patch on the sheets; this couldn't get any worse! He tried desperately to recall a drying charm, heart thumping so hard in his chest he thought he was going to wake the whole room and then he'd be found out! What is it what is it what is it? He thought beginning to really panic. Sirius would wake up and know what had happened if he couldn't think! "Airius!" He breathed a sigh of relief as the charm came back to him and hurried to the showers to clean himself up letting the cold water wash over his tingling body, calming him.  
  
***  
  
"This is awful!" Peter exclaimed, trying to pluck the courage up at the end of Herbology to ask Maria Gloves to the Yule Ball. She was a small and shy Hufflepuff with pretty blue eyes and long mousy hair.  
  
"Oh just bite the bullet for goodness sake!" James laughed.  
  
"It's alright for you!" Peter said, hands trembling. "Lily came and asked you!"  
  
James shrugged. "I can't help it if I'm so irresistible now can I?"  
  
Remus had yet to ask anyone and after Maria agreed to Peter's stuttered invitation he realised he really would have to get a move on otherwise he'd be alone all night with his friends now all having dates. He had been close to tears as Sirius raved about how pretty Penny Jackson, one of Lily's roommates was and how he couldn't wait to show her off on the dance floor.  
  
All he wanted was to have had Sirius ask him, whether it was socially acceptable or not, he just wanted to be the one in the dark haired ones arms, the one being kissed with his soft full lips, the one to get the compliments about how he looked, but that wouldn't happen, how could anyone, least of all the universally fancied Sirius, want someone so physically and emotionally scarred as himself?  
  
***  
  
"Looking good Jamie boy! Lily will think you like nice!" Sirius smiled appreciatively at James in his red and gold trimmed dress robes.  
  
Remus couldn't help but think Sirius looked rather nice himself in deep blue velvet robes which matched his glistening eyes. Even Peter looked smart in simple black robes.  
  
Sirius turned to take in the sight of Remus, the silver of his robes contrasting with the gold of his hair yet matching the small streaks, he looked beautiful but Sirius was too embarrassed to say so as they made their way down to the great hall to meet their dates for the evening.  
  
"Good evening Suzanne." Remus said. He'd finally managed to ask the Ravenclaw girl whom he worked with at times in the library to accompany him. He didn't find her attractive although she was slender with neat blond hair and a smiling face. He didn't find any girls attractive, but Suzanne was pleasant enough and he found her conversation interesting so surely the night couldn't be too bad.  
  
The feast went well and Remus was starting to relax with the wine they were allowed. The dancing started and even Peter got up with Maria. Sirius was swinging Penny around the dance floor but Remus remained at the table chatting with James and the two girls.  
  
The night went on and as the slow music came on Remus got Suzanne up to dance along with Lily and James. Carefully the werewolf slid his arms around her small waist, swaying gently from side to side. They must have all danced for about half an hour before Suzanne excused herself to the bathroom. Remus made his way back to their table smiling as he saw Lily and James sharing a slow and intimate kiss.  
  
"Sirius?" He sat down beside his friend. Penny was sat on the other side of him looking upset. "Have you two had a fight?" Remus asked the upset looking girl.  
  
"He's drunk as can be, he's thoroughly rude and I wish I'd never said I would go with him! He's horrid!" Remus put an arm around Penny as she burst into tears. "I wanted to go with him so much, he's so attractive and everyone loves him, I was looking forward to it so much but he's not nice at all! Good looking and arrogant, I hate him!" She turned and fled from the room.  
  
"Well done mate!" Remus said, annoyed with Sirius, yet deep down unable to feel anything but love for his friend.  
  
Sirius looked up bleary eyed. "Wha?" He slurred, trying to focus on Remus.  
  
"Merlin almighty Sirius!" Remus was shocked "How much have you had to drink?"  
  
"Lots?" He hiccupped before swaying precariously on his seat.  
  
"Do you realise how upset she is? You've ruined her night!"  
  
Sirius shrugged lopsidedly. "Don't care about her!"  
  
Remus was even more surprised, Sirius was usually very caring about other people's feelings, he had always been sensitive towards others. "I didn't realise you were so heartless!" Remus chastised, not amused by Sirius behaviour.  
  
"I'm not!" Sirius managed to snap back, struggling to even keep his head upright. "I'm not heartless, just heartbroken."  
  
Remus was horrified as a tear ran down his friend's cheek. "Hey, hey, what's all this?"  
  
Sirius shrugged Remus' hand from his arm. "You'd hate me!" He hiccupped violently.  
  
"I'd never hate you." Remus bit back the urge to tell Sirius he loved him, if he was having girl trouble the last thing he would need was Remus revealing his forbidden love!  
  
"You.you...would!" Sirius swallowed hard.  
  
"C'mon you. Up, now!" Remus managed to pull Sirius' swaying body from the chair and tried to guide him out of the hall.  
  
"Need.to...go to.bathroom."  
  
"I can see that!" Remus whispered dragging Sirius as fast as he could behind him.  
  
"I'm sorry Remus!" Sirius was crying as Remus held his limp body over the toilet bowl.  
  
"I'll forgive you thousands wouldn't." Remus grimaced as another wave of sickness came over Sirius.  
  
"Shouldn't have drank so much!" Sirius said as Remus took some tissue and wiped Sirius' nose for him, the taller boy incapable of anything apart from crying.  
  
"I think you've learnt your lesson haven't you?"  
  
Sirius nodded and slumped against the cubicle wall, accepting the glass of water Remus had somehow managed to magic. "I was just so jealous of you and her dancing." Sirius admitted. "You both looked so comfortable and I just wanted it!"  
  
Remus felt his heart sink, Sirius liked Suzanne, that was what had brought this on.  
  
"It's not fair Remy, I hate feeling like this when it's a friend! It's wrong."  
  
Remus was about to tell Sirius he was welcome to Suzanne but at that moment the water Sirius had just swallowed decided to make a reappearance so the tawny haired boy settled for rubbing his friend's heaving back.  
  
"Sorry I've made such a fool of myself." Sirius said about half an hour later, feeling a lot better by this point.  
  
"Doesn't matter." Remus smiled, even though he was devastated. It wasn't that he didn't already know that Sirius didn't like him in the way he wanted, but Sirius even wanted the girl he'd had. Sirius could have anything and Remus felt like he always had nothing!  
  
"It does matter Remus." Sirius was still slurring from the affects of the alcohol but at least he seemed to have stopped being ill from it.  
  
"No it doesn't, it just makes a noise change for the boot to be on the other foot! It's usually you mopping me up! The least I could do was look after you. Come on, I'll get you into bed."  
  
Sirius allowed Remus to help him undress, seeming incapable of coordination. "You're really special Rem you know." Sirius spoke slowly and deliberately. "I think so much of you."  
  
Remus squeezed Sirius' hand. "You're not so bad yourself. Now get some sleep, you'll probably be a lot better in the morning once you've slept it off. I'm just going to go and explain to Suzie, she'll wonder where I've gone but then I'll come straight back to make sure you're ok."  
  
Sirius grasped at Remus' thin wrist. "Don't go! I want you to stay with me!"  
  
Remus tried, to no avail, to free himself. "I'll be straight back Siri, don't worry just close your eyes." Remus had never known Sirius to look so concerned, afraid. The drink had had a terrible affect on him. "I'll not be long, honestly, don't worry."  
  
He pulled Sirius into a tight hug and found himself unable to pull back for the bigger boy's grip. "You don't understand how special you are Remus."  
  
Sirius crushed his lips against Remus'.  
  
"Oh Merlin!" Sirius snapped back coming to his senses. "Sorry Remus! I'm so sorry. I didn't want to do that. I don't like boys, not at all, you're not what I want!" Sirius lied and Remus' dreams came crashing down. "I don't know what I'm doing! I'm drunk. Don't tell anyone! Please!"  
  
Remus just nodded and silently went to his own bed drawing the curtains around it, all thoughts of finding Suzanne gone now. His world had just come to an end, all he could do was sink onto his pillow and silently weep.  
  
"Remus!" James burst through the curtains about an hour later. "Whatever's the matter?"  
  
Remus felt his mattress sag as James sat down, realising over time his crying had increased from silent tears to anguished wailing.  
  
"What's going on? I saw you leave with Mr Pissed and now this. Shh, it can't be that bad surely? Did things go wrong with Suzanne?" James pulled Remus into a hug as the young werewolf shook his head and clung to his bespectacled friend. He knew Remus could be emotional and sensitive prior to and after the full moon but he'd never known him be so distraught, not even when they had found out his secret three years previously.  
  
"I'm so unhappy!" Remus sobbed, soaking James' shoulder where his head lay.  
  
"Have you not just had a little bit too much to drink?" James questioned, knowing alcohol could depress people.  
  
"I only had one glass!" He cried.  
  
"Ok. Well tell me what's wrong yeah? We'll sort something out." He put his finger under Remus' chin, forcing the slightly younger boy to look into his eyes. "Has Sirius said something? Because if he has I wouldn't worry about it, he's that drunk he'll not know a thing he's doing."  
  
Remus cried even harder so James knew he'd guessed rightly. "What's he done then? You shouldn't let him upset you like this you know, he wouldn't mean to."  
  
Remus wiped his eyes with his hands and leaned back against his soggy pillow and took a deep breath. "He kissed me James."  
  
James looked as if his eyes were about to pop out of his head. "Really? Merlin!" James breathed, surprised by this news. "He wouldn't have meant to offend you Rem, he's had far too much alcohol and he'll not even remember tomorrow, don't let it get to you."  
  
Remus shook his head. "You don't understand James."  
  
"Try me." James was holding Remus' small hand in his own.  
  
"I think I love him." Remus dropped his eyes not wanting to see disgust in James' face.  
  
"Are you gay?" James asked, taken aback slightly, yet somewhere inside not thoroughly surprised.  
  
"I don't know!" Remus exclaimed. "I'm so confused! I just know I love Sirius. Maybe it's just a phase, but I've felt like this for ages!" Remus couldn't believe he was revealing this to their mutual friend but he felt like he had to tell someone, he couldn't bear this on his own any longer.  
  
"Well then if he kissed you why is it so bad?"  
  
Remus bit down on his lip, trying to stop it from trembling then answered in an unsteady voice. "He said he didn't mean to, that he didn't like me like that, that it had been a drunken mistake."  
  
James nodded and enveloped Remus in his arms. "It'll work out alright Remy, believe me. I know he thinks an awful lot of you and they say when people are drunk they do things that they really mean. If it's meant to be it'll happen, and if it isn't something will work out for you, try not to worry, it won't seem nearly so bad in the morning, I promise."  
  
Remus nodded, feeling slightly better, maybe James was right, if Sirius had done it maybe somewhere inside he felt the same? He wouldn't say anything to Sirius, if he couldn't have him like that he still wanted his friendship.  
  
***  
  
After the ball James and Lily became inseparable and Peter was also seeing Maria periodically. Sirius seemed to have distanced himself from all girls, much to their displeasure, even after what Penny had to say about his behaviour at the Christmas Ball.  
  
Remus never mentioned what had happened that night, thinking this best as Sirius probably couldn't remember. James watched their behaviour closely though. He'd suspected something bizarre for nearly a year now and just wondered if Sirius would ever admit to himself how he felt, or if he would carry on denying it.  
  
"So what do we do now Remus?" Sirius had his hand laid casually on his friend's shoulder looking over the map that James had carefully drawn out.  
  
"Well first of all we have to charm it to disappear and only reappear upon our command."  
  
"How?" Peter asked, sucking on a sugar quill, them having snuck through to Honeydukes earlier that night for supplies.  
  
"Well we need a command to make it appear and then another to make it disappear." Sirius grinned, "How about. 'I solemnly swear that I am up to no good?' and then 'Mischief managed'?"  
  
Everyone laughed. "Sounds good to me."  
  
It didn't appear so good two hours later when they still were trying to accomplish this task. They'd managed, to their horror, to loose the map completely and not get it back, but after another hour James finally managed to make it reappear and with a final flick of the wand mission was accomplished.  
  
"At last!" Peter exclaimed. "I thought we'd never manage, and there's still so much to do with it. Maybe it'll be finished by the time we leave Hogwarts!"  
  
Sirius found himself unable to sleep that night. He couldn't believe how adorable Remus looked when he was concentrating. That little pink tongue between his cherry red lips, his hair falling across his face. He couldn't rid from his mind the musky and delicate scent of the boy who seemed to absorb him thoroughly.  
  
Listening quickly to ensure everyone else was sleeping he found himself slipping his hand between his legs to touch his arousal, brought about by the sleeping angel on the other side of the room.  
  
As he stroked himself slowly, he thought of everything he loved about Remus, the gracefulness with which he moved, the softness of his voice, his wicked sense of humour beneath the calm reserved exterior. The way in which he put everyone above himself, his soft hair, creamy skin and huge beautiful eyes which reflected his soul.  
  
As Sirius reached his completion he murmured to himself. "I'll tell him, he has to know, I can't live this lie; it's killing me."  
  
***  
  
"Let's go!" James announced as they all huddled under the cloak ready for their task.  
  
"Myself and Remus will create the diversion upstairs so Filch goes up there and you two sneak into his office and get the bag back!"  
  
Argus Filch had removed a large bag of a variety of items purchased the previous week from Zonko's Joke Shop having caught Sirius attempting to put down a layer of "Invisible banana slide paste" outside the Slytherin common room. As it happened Severus Snape, their intended target had slipped on it but not before Sirius had been carted off to Filch's office much to his disappointment.  
  
"Shame we didn't have two cloaks!" Remus said nervously, as he and Sirius crept stealthily in the shadows in their pyjamas, preying they wouldn't be seen.  
  
"In here!" Sirius hissed. "Ok I'll break that vase then we're going to have to run!" He threw an old vase that was in the disused classroom across the floor. It shattered loudly and upon contact the two fifteen year olds took flight.  
  
"What's that?!" They heard Filch's cruel raspy voice.  
  
"Oh shit!" Sirius muttered realising Filch wasn't in his office even to begin with and he was a lot closer to him than they'd anticipated. Catching Remus' arm he pulled him into the next room along and inside of a rather large cupboard.  
  
"I know that it's students!" They heard Filch shout. "Peeves is in the dungeon! I'll get you this time Black! I know it's you and your horrid little friends marauding around again!"  
  
"Oh no!" Remus whispered to Sirius. "He's going to kill us!"  
  
They stayed in the cupboard, hardly daring to breathe until they heard Filch retreating muttering about how much he wanted to torture them and if he ever got his hands on them he'd string them up from their ankles to hear them scream for all the trouble they caused him.  
  
"Sorry." Remus whispered as he fell over something in the cupboard and into Sirius.  
  
"It's ok." Sirius hissed back, realising his arms were still around Remus' waist where he'd grabbed hold of him to prevent him tumbling. Sirius could feel Remus' gentle breathing on his neck and felt his own breath hitch in his throat. He swallowed hard, mouth dry at the delightful yet painful closeness of the object of his affections. Remus, too, seemed in no hurry to disentangle himself from Sirius' arms.  
  
"Erm." Sirius began clearing his throat. "I..."  
  
He stopped as he realised Remus' hand was resting on his cheek. Was Remus doing what he thought? Trying to focus in the dark on Remus' face he thought he saw...was it hope? Longing? Unable to stop himself, he found his lips pressing to the smaller boy's.  
  
"Remus I..."  
  
"Shush.I want to." Remus spoke with surprising steadiness, before reaching up for another kiss, this time it lasted longer. "I've wanted to do that for so long." Remus said; blushing now and hoping desperately he'd done the right thing.  
  
"Rem, at Christmas, I told you I didn't want this...well I lied. I'm sorry if I hurt you but I didn't know what to do, I was terrified you'd hate me for it."  
  
Remus silenced him with another kiss, opening his mouth to allow access for Sirius' tongue, relishing the feel of it caressing his own, savouring the taste of the boy he adored. Eventually they pulled apart, arms still encircling each other.  
  
"I'd never hate you Siri, I've felt so strongly about you for so long. So does this mean.?"  
  
Sirius couldn't stop grinning. "I'm so glad you feel the same Remy, you're everything I want. Anyhow, much as I'm enjoying this, the others will be shitting themselves that we aren't back. Shall we?"  
  
They hurried hand in hand back through to their dormitory only letting go as they burst into the bedroom.  
  
"I thought Filch had got you!" Peter breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"No but we've been hiding out in a cupboard." Sirius exclaimed breathlessly.  
  
James was sure he saw Remus blushing and Sirius seemed different. It was almost like there was an aura around the pair. He wondered if something had finally happened between them. He hoped so, they'd been gawping and staring at one another for so long now, they deserved to be together, to share the same as what he and Lily had.  
  
"I know it's you Black, with your horrid friends marauding again!" Sirius took Filch off causing gales of laughter.  
  
"Marauding indeed!" James snorted. "Actually I quite like the sound of that. The Marauders. It suits us don't you think?"  
  
Everyone thought for a moment and altogether answered "Sounds perfect!" And so the Marauders were born.  
  
Sirius and Remus exchanged a shy glance; so much more had also been born for them that night, something special; something they had both wanted for so long now, something they wanted to last forever.  
  
TBC 


	5. Chapter 5

"I thought we'd never get any time on our own!" Remus exclaimed as Peter left the dormitory.  
  
"Well hopefully he'll be gone a fair while. I'd say he has to do a fair bit of grovelling for not replying to Maria's owl post over the summer wouldn't you?"  
  
Remus nodded. "I'd not be a happy bunny if you'd not written to me. It was bad enough not getting to see you at all, I didn't realise how difficult it would be."  
  
Sirius flushed with pleasure that Remus felt so strongly but also with a touch of guilt. "Well I didn't mean to loose my temper with my dad and accidentally explode the freezer in a tantrum resulting in being grounded!"  
  
Remus giggled. "That would have been funny."  
  
Sirius raised a doubtful eyebrow. "It would have been had I not had my backside thrashed within an inch of my life from my Mum and been grounded."  
  
Sirius tried not to discuss with anyone his true relationship with his parents and how it was descending into pure hatred between him and them. Partly because he didn't want to concern Remus with any extra troubles but also because he was embarrassed. Embarrassed to have parents who were so stuck in their ways.  
  
Maybe he was a little scared that he would seem weak for not standing up against them strongly enough when he knew perhaps he should, because all he really wanted was for them to truly love him for who he was, but with every day that passed the likelihood of this declined more and more.  
  
Remus nodded. "I've never been grounded."  
  
Sirius snorted. "God knows how not, I know that the butter wouldn't melt image is rot and rubbish, it would literally sizzle!"  
  
"What time do you reckon James will get back?" Remus asked thoughtfully.  
  
"Dunno. Perfect Prefect Potter! An hour or so?" Sirius smirked, he'd found it quite amusing that someone who could be part of pulling such ridiculous pranks could ever have been chosen to be a prefect!  
  
"Alliteration Sirius, I am impressed."  
  
After a second of confusion Sirius registered. "Do you always have to be so wise?" He teased. "You'd have made a good prefect."  
  
Remus' lip twisted slightly, then he wistfully said, "I'd have liked to be one actually, geeky as it sounds. It would have been a nice challenge. Of course I know it's because of my being a werewolf."  
  
Sirius crossed the room and wrapped his arms around Remus' waist. "You'd have made a good one Remy, they were fools not to choose you. Me on the other hand." He wiggled his eyebrows making them both giggle. "Sirius Black, brilliant scholar you may be but you do not set any kind of example worth replicating to the younger members of the school!" He'd pinched his nose up and spoke with McGonagall's crisp voice.  
  
"I think if the teachers knew half of what we got up to we'd have been expelled and James most certainly wouldn't be a prefect!"  
  
Remus rose up onto his toes and put his arms around Sirius' neck and softly kissed his lips; they were even more tender and warm than he'd remembered.  
  
"Siri if you get any taller I'm not going to be able to reach!"  
  
Sirius bent his neck down a little and in between planting light butterfly kisses on Remus' delectable mouth replied, "I'll have to put growth potion in your pumpkin juice!"  
  
Remus pulled back in mock horror. "You just dare! You did that to Snape and his nose swelled up like some great parsnip sprouting from his face! You'll just have to pick me up if you continue to grow! It's not like I weigh much!"  
  
"Shut up Remus." Sirius said jovially and stroking the honeyed hair back from his boyfriend's face, tucking it behind his ear and returning to his mouth, running his tongue agilely over the smaller boy's bottom lip until the mouth opened to the probing, welcoming it in before sliding his own out to greet Sirius'.  
  
Before long Remus had his hand wound through Sirius thick black locks and the other gripping his neck, softly rubbing the heated flesh with his thumb. Sirius moaned into Remus' open mouth as he pulled the werewolf closer to him, a hand now under his shirt to hold his back, the other possessively gripping Remus' backside. The kissing had never been so passionate before and the enforced separation had made the desire for each other so much stronger as their tongues danced together battling for supremacy.  
  
And that is how James found them.  
  
"Ahem!" He coughed, surprised at the heated scene he had just walked in on. The two boys jumped apart, having lost all track of time absorbed in one another.  
  
"Good meeting James?" Remus realised his voice was squeaky, not sure if that was from the effect of Sirius' skilled mouth or the shock at being caught in the act!  
  
"Not bad, not half as interesting as what you two have been up to though by the looks of it!"  
  
Remus hurriedly sat down on his bed, placing his hands strategically in his lap to hide the tenting of his trousers, aroused by the passion of losing himself with Sirius.  
  
Sirius was blushing furiously, James seemed to be enjoying him squirm while Remus couldn't help but think the usually cocksure Sirius looked adorable with reddened cheeks.  
  
"It is what it looks like." Sirius eventually stammered, sliding down beside Remus and slipping an arm around his lover's waist.  
  
"It's about time I have to say!" James chortled at the look of astonishment on Sirius' face.  
  
"What do you mean?" This made James chuckle more.  
  
"Well the pair of you have been mooning around over one another for goodness knows how long! So is this something that's just happened?"  
  
Sirius appeared to be lost for words, not having realised that James had the slightest clue.  
  
Remus rescued him. "We've both felt this way for quite a while and finally did something about it at the very end of last term, erm in the cupboard hiding from Filch actually! We might have to thank the man! Can you imagine his face?" This seemed to reduce the tension from Sirius.  
  
"So are you ok with this James?"  
  
"Yeah, I mean other people mightn't like it, like the whole female population. Remus, a bunch of second years were discussing what a nice arse you have by the way, bless them."  
  
"We would have told you Jamie, but well, it's new to us as well and we know it won't be everyone's cup of tea so we kept it to ourselves. We'll let our close friends know when we're ready so will you keep it to yourself?" Remus asked as Sirius got a wicked glint in his eye.  
  
"Yeah or I'll tell Malfoy about Lily going down on you in the shower!" James' eyes nearly popped out of his head.  
  
"Erm I'll definitely be keeping quiet! At least until I have greater ammunition against you Black! Why did I ever tell him about that?" James muttered as he disappeared downstairs to the common room.  
  
***  
  
"He'll be back from the library soon! Peter, come on!" Sirius was hopping from one leg to the other and waving his arms.  
  
"You should have become a chicken not a dog Sirius the way you're flapping around!" Sirius' eyes bore into Peter and James clasped a hand on his friend's shoulder.  
  
"Why don't you try again Peter? If you can't do it we'll just have to keep trying for next month. One more month isn't the end of the world." James tried to relax Peter in the hope that his calming affect might help the rounded panicking boy.  
  
"I managed earlier!" Peter whined wishing Sirius wasn't giving him the daggers look that he was.  
  
"You've managed once! Me and James have been able to do it since the beginning of the summer! Poor Remus, if you cared about him you'd try harder!"  
  
James glared. "Take your time Peter, Sirius is being a pillock!" Peter swallowed hard and nodded, his face written with pure concentration.  
  
"You did it!" Peter changed back and nearly had the life squashed out of him by Sirius. "Well done!"  
  
"Shh! He's coming!" James hissed as the three of them dived onto their individual beds.  
  
"What are you up to?" Remus asked suspiciously as he rubbed his eyes, the pull of the moon tiring him.  
  
"Nothing." Chorused three voices as they looked around hoping to look natural.  
  
"Well now I know you're up to something. You do know it is the full moon tonight so if you were planning to count me in on whatever scandal you're developing you'd better count me back out." He tried to sound nonchalant but inside felt let down. It wouldn't be the first time they had played pranks while he was alone in the shack. He'd have thought at least Sirius would have remembered and had a little consideration, he knew how distressing it was for his boyfriend after all.  
  
"Well you know, we were planning on changing the décor in the Slytherin common room." James said lightly.  
  
"Well thanks for including me!" Remus stamped off, unable to control himself this close to the full moon.  
  
"Oops!" Peter mouthed, no sound coming out of his mouth.  
  
"I'll go." Sighing Sirius set off after Remus wishing they'd finished the Marauders Map but still having a few spells to cast on it so resorting to manual searching.  
  
"You'll be freezing!" Sirius took his cloak off and put it around Remus' shoulders.  
  
"How did you know I was here?" Remus' voice was cold; Sirius didn't like it.  
  
"I remembered you saying when you wanted to think you came and sat here among the bushes."  
  
Remus gave one nod of his head in acknowledgement before adding "Shame you didn't remember it was the full moon when you plotted to do something you knew I'd want to be involved in. You're many things Sirius but I never thought you'd be so selfish as to exclude me. I thought I meant more to you than that!"  
  
"Oh Remy." Sirius began wrapping his arms around his despondent lover.  
  
"Don't 'oh Remy' me!" Remus snapped and shrugged Sirius' hands off.  
  
"Remus you don't understand..." He tried again.  
  
"No, you're wrong. I understand perfectly well that Malfoy pissed you off earlier on so you're going to get him back as soon as possible and it doesn't matter to you that someone you say is special can't join in the fun because...whoops he's a werewolf!"  
  
Sirius was taken aback; it was so unlike Remus to loose his temper, yet this hadn't been the first time. He knew it was the wolf trying to get out. Vying for power with the boy, demanding to get control.  
  
"Listen to me." Sirius kept his voice calm and even, not planning to take on Remus in this frame of mind, knowing he'd be fighting a losing battle. "We've got something planned and it does involve you ok, now come with me and we'll show you."  
  
Reluctantly Remus allowed Sirius to take his hand and was pulled back towards the castle.  
  
"I'd not leave you out Rem.things aren't half as good without you there too." Sirius thought that speaking these words would make him cringe but it didn't, he felt a fuzzy sensation in his stomach; it made him feel good about himself.  
  
"Sit down." Sirius ordered once they were back with the others. Scowling sceptically about this plan they'd concocted he slumped onto his bed. "I'll let you go first James.I present you Mr Prongs!" Suddenly a stag appeared in James' place, before he reappeared.  
  
"What the..." Remus trailed off as Sirius spoke again.  
  
"Mr Wormtail!" Sirius held his breath for almost a minute as Peter remained standing but eventually could breathe again as a small grey rat materialised in Peter's place.  
  
"And finally Mr Padfoot!" Peter announced breathless with relief that he had managed to pull it off!  
  
"So then Mr Moony what do you think?" Sirius turned grinning to Remus who was trying to close his mouth.  
  
"I...I...Wow!"  
  
"We figured if we became animagi then we could accompany you on the full moons." James explained.  
  
"It was Sirius' idea - we've been working on it for nearly 3 years now!" Peter added excited, so glad that he'd pulled his stunt off. "And we thought up nicknames - so you're Moony alright?"  
  
"Thank you." Remus finally managed, tears filling his eyes. "Thank you so much." First he hugged Peter and then James, finally coming to Sirius. "You don't know how much this means to me!" He whispered into Sirius' ear.  
  
"Oh I don't know, I feel pretty amazing about it so I'm reckoning you are too."  
  
"I love you!" Remus murmured to him. Sirius thought his heart might explode.  
  
"Yeah...I love you too!"  
  
The three boys slipped away under the invisibility cloak to the Whomping Willow after dinner, Peter touching the notch as planned. They were all a touch nervous, what if Remus didn't like company once he was in his lupine form? What if he did attack them? Sirius was nervous about seeing Remus transform, he was sure it wouldn't be pretty.  
  
Remus froze and began shuddering pretty much as soon as he arrived in the shack. His classmates transformed at once, Peter again extremely relieved he'd managed it, if he hadn't he'd be faced with the werewolf now in front of him! Remus sniffed them all and made a small whining noise. One by one the others stepped up to him, the wolf willingly accepting the new members of his pack before settling down curled up to Padfoot, his friend, his love, his saviour. Never had he transformed and not torn himself to shreds until now.  
  
***  
  
"So you'll bring Lily up here?" Sirius asked.  
  
"For the third time yes!" James laughed.  
  
"I'm so nervous, what if Peter and her hate us?"  
  
James sighed. "Lily's not like that. She'll be pleased for you both."  
  
It was the night of the Christmas Ball. Peter had been surprised when neither Remus nor Sirius had a date.  
  
"We're not staying long." Remus had said, which confused Peter even more. He'd finally grovelled enough to win Maria back so she would be meeting him later in the hall. But first Sirius had some announcement that they needed to wait for Lily for.  
  
James brought Lily, dressed in a satin sapphire robe and looking stunning, into the room. "Hi everyone." She smiled. Remus had to admit she was extremely beautiful; it was no wonder James loved her.  
  
"I hope you're going to behave better this year!" She joked with Sirius. "I've had to listen to how dreadful you were last year for the past two hours!"  
  
"I promise to behave." Sirius ducked his head down, pretending to be like a small boy being scolded by his mother, it wasn't a hard act to perfect, after all he'd had an awful lot of practise!  
  
"Right." Sirius took a deep breath and reached out for Remus' smaller hand, squeezing it softly. "I know everyone is wondering why neither myself or Remus have asked anyone to the dance with us. We are well aware that all of the girls in our year and the one below think that we have secret dates who we will reveal on the night and perhaps that's what the boys think as well. But it's not true."  
  
Peter looked perplexed, why were they holding hands? Lily had a knowing look in her emerald eyes and smiled encouragingly at Sirius. "We won't be dancing with anyone tonight because we're only staying until after the feast. We can't dance with the people who we want to in the Great Hall and so we see no reason to remain there when we can come back here and dance together, because we're in love with each other."  
  
Remus nodded, hardly daring to breathe let alone speak as he waited for the response.  
  
"Oh that is just so romantic!" Lily squealed before hugging them both. "Coming back up here to dance together. It's beautiful. Congratulations, who would ever have thought it - the ladies man Sirius Black, my word! And Remus as well, the strong silent type the girlies love! They will be so disappointed when this gets out!" Remus' amber eyes grew large. "No, no silly! I won't tell anyone don't worry! I'm happy for you and it's up to you when to tell people but I really appreciate you letting me in on your secret; your other secret."  
  
She smiled at Remus, James had told her earlier in the year and she had been wonderfully supportive, he should have known better than to be afraid of Lily's reaction to his and Sirius' relationship.  
  
Sirius turned his gaze on Peter. James elbowed the chubby blond boy.  
  
"But you're both boys!" He couldn't stop himself from saying.  
  
Remus got there before Sirius, afraid that Sirius would be abusive. "We know that, and that's why we can't be open about this with everyone, but we wanted our friends to know and that's why you three are the only ones who know."  
  
Peter nodded slowly, still trying to fathom it all when Sirius spoke. "I know it's a shock Pete but we do love each other, just like James and Lily love each other, just because we're both boys doesn't mean we can't be affectionate and attracted to each other."  
  
"It might take me a while to get used to." Peter said still reeling in shock. He'd always thought Sirius was going to make himself a reputation by getting every girl in their year pregnant or something. Being gay hadn't been something he'd ever suspected from his dark haired fellow Gryffindor.  
  
"But I'm your friend and I'll support you even if it isn't something I feel 100% comfortable about. I'll be fine with it provided I don't have to see anything really icky!"  
  
"Don't worry, I'll only suck on his balls when you're asleep!" Sirius said with a wink causing Remus to blush furiously while trying to look indignant and everyone else laughed before heading downstairs.  
  
"I'll just add at this point that we haven't done anything 'icky' yet so you needn't worry Peter!" Remus muttered. "We're not ready yet."  
  
James overheard and dropping back from Lily murmured, "You should do Rem, it's incredible!"  
  
"James, don't discuss our intimate details please, or you'll never lose your virginity, at least not to me!" That shut the tousle-haired boy up sharpish!  
  
***  
  
"Thank Merlin we escaped!" Sirius laughed as he and Remus ran hand in hand from the hall. "I want to kiss you so much you wouldn't believe." Remus flushed slightly, Sirius voice had a new husky edge, which couldn't fail to excite the tawny haired boy.  
  
"Oh Sirius!" Remus' hand flew to his mouth. "This is wonderful!" He found his way into the taller boy's arms, kissing him tenderly.  
  
"Anything for you sweetheart." Remus felt his heart swelling at the term of endearment. Sirius had got the house elves to bring up an enchanted miniature piano and violin and they played soft, romantic music. On Sirius' bedside table two glasses of champagne stood along with a small plate of chocolates.  
  
"You're so romantic!"  
  
Slowly they danced, bodies crushed together, lips and tongues gliding over one another as they swayed to the slow, delicate music. Sirius could feel Remus' erection pressing against his thigh as the shorter boy suckled softly at his neck and was certain Remus would be able to feel his own arousal.  
  
Stroking Remus' cheek with the back of his hand he whispered into his boyfriend's ear, catching his earlobe with his tongue. "Shall we take this to bed?"  
  
Carefully Sirius removed his dress robe and Remus followed suit, leaving them both stood in just their shirts and boxers. Sirius reached out to unbutton Remus shirt and was surprised when he saw fear in his amber eyes.  
  
"Moony what's wrong my love? We don't have to do anything.whatever you're most comfortable with."  
  
"I'm ugly." Remus stated blankly as if there were no argument to the point.  
  
Sirius cupped his face softly. "You are most definitely not ugly! Are you worried about your scars?"  
  
Remus bit on his lower lip and nodded. "Nobody has seen me naked before and I'm just very conscious that I'm different and I'm frightened you won't find me attractive once you've seen my body." He confessed.  
  
"I love you Remy, all of you, with or without your scars." He slowly began to undo his own shirt, allowing Remus to make the decision about his own. Doubtful, yet comforted by Sirius' gentle tone Remus removed his own shirt and held his breath waiting for Sirius to see him.  
  
"You're so gorgeous." He said without even realising he was passing comment on the darker boy's firm, lean body.  
  
"So are you." Sirius gently ran his hands across Remus' shoulders, letting them slide down his chest and over his stomach before taking hold of him and pulling him onto the bed to lie beside him.  
  
Remus shivered slightly, more from anticipation than the winter air. Sirius pulled him closer and moaned softly into Remus' mouth as they connected once again. Remus' graceful hand slid down between them, playing with the soft treasure trail of hair on Sirius' flat stomach, mewling mellifluously as Sirius caressed his smooth buttocks.  
  
Their kissing became more fierce and feral, breathing more ragged as Remus' hand ventured lower into the ebony curled mass before hesitating, wanting to touch but not certain if he should. He'd never touched anyone before so intimately, never touched another body but his own. Sirius hand entwined with his own, guiding Remus down onto his arousal, reassuring his boyfriend.  
  
"Hmmm." Sirius sighed as he pressed his hips upwards into Remus' grip, delighting in the sensation of another's hand on his form. "That feels so good!"  
  
Hearing the sheer arousal in Sirius' voice made Remus bolder as he began to stroke him firmly, his own cock twitching from desire before his hips bucking as Sirius took hold of him.  
  
"Ooh! Sirius!" Remus couldn't control his orgasm, releasing after Sirius had only stroked him twice, feeling bad he hadn't been able to last but overwhelmed by the strength of his emotions and the passion between them.  
  
Feeling the warmth and stickiness on his hand and seeing the ecstasy on Remus' face brought Sirius to his climax with a long groan as his back arched from the bed.  
  
Once Sirius had his breathing back under control he tilted Remus' chin up with his hand and they shared a soft kiss. "That was beautiful Re, just like you." Remus glowed; nothing in his life had ever been so special.  
  
"It felt wonderful, because it was you, it's always you." He rested his head on Sirius' broad chest and sighed with contentment.  
  
"We shared our first kiss on this bed last year to the day." Sirius mused as he stroked Remus' soft hair.  
  
With a hint of sarcasm Remus replied, "Hardly an anniversary worth celebrating - the pair of us in floods of tears and you being sick as a dog!"  
  
Sirius snorted, "I am a dog!"  
  
"And aren't I glad of it, you wouldn't believe the difference it makes to me, I'm so grateful."  
  
"Here." Sirius passed one of the glasses of champagne to Remus and sipped slowly on his own. "I'm drinking within reason tonight - no repeats of last year, after all I'm having the most perfect time of my life." He slipped a chocolate into Remus' delectable mouth, smiling as the moist tongue wrapped around his fingers as Moony accepted the gift.  
  
"Stay with me tonight, I want to hold you." Sirius said once the alcohol and chocolates had been finished.  
  
"What about the others?" Remus asked, not sure whether they would appreciate them curled up together.  
  
"We're doing no harm, and I don't want to let you go. I'm never going to let you go, you're too precious."  
  
"You're rather exceptional yourself." Remus settled down in Sirius' arms, laying his head on his lover's shoulder, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. "You smell wonderful, it's great being a werewolf sometimes, some smells are so much more real."  
  
"So this is where it happened?" Sirius' fingers slid over the extensive white scar on Remus' chest.  
  
The young werewolf momentarily tensed but relaxed as Sirius gently massaged him. "Yeah it is."  
  
Sirius didn't want to push about the ins and outs, knowing Remus wasn't keen on talking about this. "You are beautiful Remy, never think these scars make you anything less. You are the most exquisite person you know that."  
  
Remus felt his own lips curl into a smile. "Thanks Siri. I feel so inadequate sometimes because of what's happened. You make that better you know."  
  
Sirius kissed his forehead. "I'm glad."  
  
Remus stifled a yawn. "C'mon darling, you're tired. Snuggle in." With a wave of his wand Sirius stopped the music and extinguished the candles. "Sleep well beautiful."  
  
James came up to the dormitory about half an hour later. Lily was exhausted so they'd called it a night. Removing his dress robe he turned and saw his two friends asleep together, Sirius' hair spread out on his pillow, an arm around Remus' sleeping form. The smaller boy had a small smile gracing his peaceful face, which lay beneath Sirius' chin. James couldn't help but think they fitted together perfectly as he pulled the curtains around the bed, allowing them their privacy.  
  
***  
  
"I'm dreading the OWLS!" Remus whined as they sat in potions as the lesson came to a close.  
  
"Me and potions really don't mix!" Peter snorted. "You are so much better than me - I'm going to fail everything as well as potions!"  
  
"My word Lupin." Malfoy sneered. "Aren't your robes looking tatty. I'd get rid of those if I was you."  
  
"Just because your parents are rolling in dirty money!" James spat back.  
  
"Oh no I think Loopy here could do with losing these." Lucius winked at Snape.  
  
"Disrobiarmus!" The greasy haired boy grinned evilly as Remus' clothes fell from him leaving him just stood in his boxers as the Slytherins cackled with laughter.  
  
Snatching his robe up around his body Remus fled from the dungeon, tears in his eyes.  
  
"You fucking bastard!" Sirius screamed, launching at Snape before James could grab at him. "That was just cruel!" He punched Snape in the face, bursting his nose and making his teeth go through his lip. "You'll not get away with this!" Sirius charged off after Remus.  
  
"Oh Remy." Sirius pulled Remus into his arms, the paler boy looking at his body in the mirror in the bedroom.  
  
"Why did he do it Sirius? Why me?"  
  
"'Cos he's an evil git that's why." He kissed Remus' bare shoulder. "I punched him in the face." Sirius couldn't help but grin, "That'll teach him to mess with us!"  
  
"Sirius, you'll be in so much trouble!" Remus gasped. "You didn't have to do that!"  
  
Sirius shook his head. "I wanted to, it gave me great pleasure and I don't care whether I'm in trouble or not, it was worth it just to rearrange his ugly face!"  
  
"I wouldn't care Sirius, it's just...what if they saw my scars - what if they all know now?"  
  
Sirius sighed, he knew Remus was funny about people seeing him without his clothes on. "Darling, you pulled your robe back up really quickly, I'm sure they wouldn't have noticed, it isn't that obvious."  
  
"They're obvious to me, reminders everyday that I should never have disobeyed my mother. If I hadn't ran off from her I'd never have been bitten! It's all my own fault!"  
  
"Don't be so hard on yourself Remus. You're really brave dealing with it like you do and I will not hear you belittle yourself like this. It's just what Snape wants. C'mon sweetheart, get dressed and we'll go down to Transfiguration or McGonagall will."  
  
"I'll do what Mr Black?" Sirius froze and let go of Remus, who hurriedly dressed himself.  
  
"You see Professor, Remus here is a little bit upset, Severus Snape he."  
  
"Severus Snape is in the hospital wing because you have punched him! Explain yourself at once!" He'd never seen her look so angry.  
  
"He cast a disrobing charm on Remus and what with his lycanthropy and his scars he was upset, I know I was wrong Professor, I just lost my temper. I'm sorry."  
  
"You have disappointed me Mr. Black. Violence does not pay and two wrongs certainly do not make a right."  
  
Sirius tried to look sorry, although he was more sorry he had been found out, which he had known he would be, than repentant for what he had done.  
  
"You will do detention tonight and the night after with Mr Filch." Sirius groaned. "Think yourself lucky I am not taking any more than 50 points from Gryffindor, I am extremely disappointed in you! Now get to class, both of you!"  
  
***  
  
Ever since the disrobing incident Sirius had been intent on getting back at Snape, who had got away with the whole situation. "Thank Merlin this map is finished!" He grinned.  
  
"Ok." James said. "The plan is we all get under the cloak and head to the dungeons - the map should give us the password and we can avoid all people because they'll show up. This is such a great invention even if I do say so myself!"  
  
Remus took over. "Then we sneak into the dormitory after casting a silencing charm on ourselves and we find Snape's cloak and cast the spell - everyone but him should be able to see it, and nobody but us will know we did it - nobody can prove a thing!"  
  
"Shit - Filch!" Peter hissed, acting as map-reader.  
  
"Where?" Sirius demanded.  
  
"Next corridor. We'll have to go down this one and down the other stairs, takes a bit longer but is definitely safer - shame really I'd have loved to kick that ruddy cat!"  
  
Filch had just got a kitten, Mrs Norris, and she was as bad as her owner.  
  
"I love this map!" Remus grinned and squeezed Sirius' hand as they stood outside of the Slytherin Common Room and the password flashed up for them in neat little scroll.  
  
"Draconis" James spoke clearly as the portrait swung back and let them in.  
  
"Let's get the git!" Peter growled, his hatred of Snape as great as everyone elses.  
  
"Let me do the honours" Remus said since it was he who sought vengeance mostly. "Done it!"  
  
Peter was becoming nervous as Malfoy seemed to be sleeping only lightly. "We'd better get out of here!"  
  
"One minute!" Sirius winked before gathering some spit in his mouth and firing it at Snape. "Take that bastard!"  
  
"I'd say that was mission accomplished. Just wait until breakfast tomorrow morning, how I'm going to laugh!" James giggled as they clambered into bed.  
  
"Fucking hell!" Sirius suddenly shouted as he was about to clear the map. "McGonagall is coming up the stairs!"  
  
Remus didn't have time to dart into his own bed as Minerva opened the door and strode in.  
  
"Oh.I'm sorry boys. Mr Filch said there were students out of bed near the Slytherin dungeons and with your reputation I thought it best to come and check what with recent events." She glared at Sirius, seeming to take a double take. "Mr Lupin is there a problem with your own bed?"  
  
Remus couldn't prevent the colour rushing to his cheeks. He didn't often get into bed with Sirius but the excitement of the night had his blood pumping and he'd been hoping for some extracurricular attention after James and Peter had gone to sleep.  
  
"Not really Professor. Myself and Sirius were just discussing some things and we didn't want to be noisy because James is really tired and trying to sleep."  
  
"Likely story." She said looking down her nose at them through her glasses. "Get to sleep now boys please. Into your own bed Lupin." Reluctantly Remus took himself across.  
  
Two hours later he couldn't sleep. All he could think of was Sirius. Sirius kissing him, licking his nipples, stroking him to orgasm, caressing his tender balls. Pushing down his pyjama bottoms Remus took hold of his engorged erection and began rubbing with long firm strokes.  
  
Sirius too was unable to sleep but had thought Remus had drifted off long since before he heard the erotic groans and gasps from his boyfriend's bed. The sounds and the thought of Remus masturbating caused all blood to rush from Sirius' head down to his genitals. He found himself getting out of bed and into Remus'.  
  
"Is that for me?" He asked Remus, who jumped with shock, having been carried away into his own world in the sensation coursing through his body.  
  
"Mm Hmm. Always is." Remus answered, turning onto his back, legs spread, allowing Sirius to see him.  
  
Sirius gasped. Remus looked so perfect, eyes shining, cheeks flushed, pyjama top hitched up and bottoms now discarded, his cock red and damp.  
  
Unable to stop himself Sirius nestled between Remus' legs and reached out with his tongue lapping at the weeping slit. Remus gave a small cry, partly surprised as Sirius had never done this before and also in delight at how wonderful it felt.  
  
Before long he was shamefully thrusting into the warm cavern and it didn't take long before he climaxed in Sirius' mouth with a loud cry.  
  
"Ooh, that was just amazing." He gasped, voice shuddering from the enormity of the experience. He reached out to slide his hand into Sirius' bottoms to find his hand coming into contact with a sticky mass of hair.  
  
"I erm already came." Sirius blushed furiously. "Doing that to you turned me on so much."  
  
Remus smiled, feeling on cloud nine that Sirius found him so attractive that it could bring such a physical response from the raven haired boy.  
  
"If you two have quite finished mauling and pawing at each other do you reckon I can go back to sleep."  
  
Sirius fell off the bed in fright as James' voice echoed through the darkened room. "Just going." Sirius stumbled to his bed thoroughly mortified.  
  
Remus thought he might just die, whether this was from embarrassment at being caught having oral sex or because of sensory overload from the experience he wasn't quite sure.  
  
"Oh and Sirius." James piped up again. "You might want to wipe your mouth, you've missed a bit." The messy haired boy cackled loudly.  
  
"I'm knackered." Remus yawned as they trudged towards breakfast the next morning.  
  
"Well if you will spend the early hours having your cock sucked!" James laughed and Remus went crimson.  
  
All that was forgotten suddenly as Snape appeared and half of the hall burst out laughing. In green letters on his back "I am Malfoy's personal arselicker" was emblazoned.  
  
"Professor it was Black and Potter, I know it was!" He was protesting before long to McGonagall who looked displeased at the state of Snape's cloak.  
  
"Mr Snape, suspicious of them as it may appear I know they were in fact in bed last night. We will clear the writing from the cloak but I'm afraid unless someone confesses, which is highly unlikely, this 'joke' will have to be forgotten about. Now stop hassling me about other students or I shall take points from you!"  
  
***  
  
"12 OWLs each!" Peter gasped. "I thought I was doing damn well with 8!" He groaned. "Oh well, my Mum will still be pleased with me, I wasn't really expected to get more than about 5!"  
  
"Well then that's an achievement in itself isn't it." They were talking on the Hogwarts Express on the journey back to Kings Cross hardly able to believe they had sat their OWLs already and the school year was once again over.  
  
"I think my parents might be rather pleased." Sirius said hopefully, not in fact sure at all that they would be proud of him, they never were. He had Remus' head on his shoulder, cherishing their time together before the holidays. "I think they were concerned that I wouldn't do as well as I might due to all my pranks but at least I seem to have the capacity to do both well. Filch would have loved to pin the dungbomb in his office on me but once again Black evades capture!"  
  
He laughed. "Well my dears here we are, see you all during the holidays." Checking nobody was looking, he pecked Remus on the lips. "I'll owl everyday. I love you." 


End file.
